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Justin Home Visit - I feel Strange - Unclear
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<blockquote data-quote="LittleDudesMom" data-source="post: 136116" data-attributes="member: 805"><p>David,</p><p> </p><p>After reading your post and Shari's reply, I have to agree with her. His attitude, actions, and behaviors over the home visit were typical teen stuff. If I had a dollar for everytime I've had to remind the kids (both easy child and difficult child) to put the trash from some snack or something into the trash and not on the counter, I would be a rich woman (or at least I'd have a new outfit or two)!!!!!!!!!!!!!</p><p> </p><p>In regards to him not thanking you for the guitar, that's kinda teen stuff too. My teen easy child and my 12 year old difficult child are pretty appreciative kids, but I don't think it's a depressing situation when your teen boy forgets to say thank you. Perhaps a little reminder from you would have been a good lesson.</p><p> </p><p>Shari's right in that I don't go to bed everyday saying "what a wonderful day". Kids will be kids and life happens. </p><p> </p><p>The real issue is that you miss your boy. You look forward to visiting him and you look forward to spending time with him. He's not going to run into your arms with joy and then come home and clean the house! He's going to act morose from time to time, want to just chill and watch a movie sometime, complain about the Residential Treatment Center (RTC) when it's time to return, and he's going to buck you from time to time. That's called life.</p><p> </p><p>What you really have look at is the big picture. Sometimes we focus so closely on the corners, that we don't see the room. Your son is obviously making progress at the Residential Treatment Center (RTC). You've said that yourself. He was not disrespectful to you or his grandmother. That's progress!</p><p> </p><p>Don't walk on eggshells when he's home. If there is a lesson to be taught, teach it. He needs to know that you will hold him to consequences and standards when this gig is over. He knows you love you. And, we know you do as well.</p><p> </p><p>All in all, you had a nice visit with your son. Take joy in the time you are able to spend with him, and have no rosey expectations. The reality of life is what he needs to grow and be successful in the future.</p><p> </p><p>In regards to you mom, ignore her pouting and don't let her words get you. She's obviously a tad high maintenance! Have confidence that you are growing during this time as well. You have stopped drinking and you are working and supporting a household. That's huge!</p><p> </p><p>Sharon</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="LittleDudesMom, post: 136116, member: 805"] David, After reading your post and Shari's reply, I have to agree with her. His attitude, actions, and behaviors over the home visit were typical teen stuff. If I had a dollar for everytime I've had to remind the kids (both easy child and difficult child) to put the trash from some snack or something into the trash and not on the counter, I would be a rich woman (or at least I'd have a new outfit or two)!!!!!!!!!!!!! In regards to him not thanking you for the guitar, that's kinda teen stuff too. My teen easy child and my 12 year old difficult child are pretty appreciative kids, but I don't think it's a depressing situation when your teen boy forgets to say thank you. Perhaps a little reminder from you would have been a good lesson. Shari's right in that I don't go to bed everyday saying "what a wonderful day". Kids will be kids and life happens. The real issue is that you miss your boy. You look forward to visiting him and you look forward to spending time with him. He's not going to run into your arms with joy and then come home and clean the house! He's going to act morose from time to time, want to just chill and watch a movie sometime, complain about the Residential Treatment Center (RTC) when it's time to return, and he's going to buck you from time to time. That's called life. What you really have look at is the big picture. Sometimes we focus so closely on the corners, that we don't see the room. Your son is obviously making progress at the Residential Treatment Center (RTC). You've said that yourself. He was not disrespectful to you or his grandmother. That's progress! Don't walk on eggshells when he's home. If there is a lesson to be taught, teach it. He needs to know that you will hold him to consequences and standards when this gig is over. He knows you love you. And, we know you do as well. All in all, you had a nice visit with your son. Take joy in the time you are able to spend with him, and have no rosey expectations. The reality of life is what he needs to grow and be successful in the future. In regards to you mom, ignore her pouting and don't let her words get you. She's obviously a tad high maintenance! Have confidence that you are growing during this time as well. You have stopped drinking and you are working and supporting a household. That's huge! Sharon [/QUOTE]
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