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Life here is still not going well
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<blockquote data-quote="Star*" data-source="post: 525367" data-attributes="member: 4964"><p>I wish I knew what to say here. I think the two of you are so batlle weary, and tired of people dumping on you - you're BOTH just raw. The only ones either of you can take it out on is each other. And you do that in spades. In a way I like the idea of a weekend get away. In another? I think Well if you're going to kill someone why not just as well do it in your home town (so to speak not literally) </p><p></p><p>I do know when you hurt physically? And have financial strains, stress of children, difficult child, difficult child daughter in laws, things you love taken away, taken away, taken away - and more BS dumped on you than a cow manure fertilizer factory? A lot of people don't lean towards each other - they snap, snap snap and then POP. It's easier to just let the snapping go on - than it is to sit down and admit - to your mate "You know what/ I've been a real jerk and I apologize - BECAUSE - what you're really hoping for most times is the mate to say ME TOO." and after enough of only one mate stating they are sorry and the other one stale - eventually what you get is the first mate getting the idea - YOU KNOW WHAT YOU JERK - it's NOT ALL my fault you had a hand in it to, but do you EVER apologize? Noooooooo or spouting off before the other one actualy works up the courage to say - GOSH you know what I didn't say it earlier but I've really been sharky too - and I'm sorry." (jumping the gun on them causes feelings of OH yeah - well fine tell me MORE about my problems alber switzer) </p><p></p><p>So for about how long I've told you I personally didn't want to talk or see anyone and was WAY beyond sharky and snarky? Yeah well I sat down last night and told DF I don't mean to be, I don't want to direct my mouth at him or my sharpness, however I believe most of it has been, and if he's felt it, taken it that way or it actually has been? I'm very sorry, I love him, I need him, and I apologize. It took about fifteen minutes for him to come back with - ME too.....and his version of what I said only in manspeak - but had I gotten defensive or jumped the gun? I would NEVER EVER gotten his apology - and if he had never said anything? I would have just left, and been done with it for now. I really have been a bear. SOME of it? Yup things he's done - but I had to sit back and ask myself honestly - WHAT portion of what he's doing is really making me angrier - or is it just exaccerbated by my moods. With honesty as a compas for my moodometer? He really hadnot done much - he'd really been trying harder. So I gave credit for that, and thanked him. It's sparked him to do quite a lot more. I think apologizing for being Atillia the noFUN - helped a lot. </p><p></p><p>I dunno J - Everyones different - I just know I don't like to be at odds with DF and I REFUSE ABSOLUTELY refuse to go to bed angry. After loosing two kids? I realize the last words I say to someone at bedtime or before departing really mean a lot. After almost loosing you? Tony should feel that way too.......He's really a good man - and you're a fine woman. Maybe you both need to remind each other ........</p><p></p><p>I'm sorry you're hurting.....butif you DO NOT bring a puppy - you should come see me. lol........NO PUPPIES or you'll go home with an EVIL CAT.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Star*, post: 525367, member: 4964"] I wish I knew what to say here. I think the two of you are so batlle weary, and tired of people dumping on you - you're BOTH just raw. The only ones either of you can take it out on is each other. And you do that in spades. In a way I like the idea of a weekend get away. In another? I think Well if you're going to kill someone why not just as well do it in your home town (so to speak not literally) I do know when you hurt physically? And have financial strains, stress of children, difficult child, difficult child daughter in laws, things you love taken away, taken away, taken away - and more BS dumped on you than a cow manure fertilizer factory? A lot of people don't lean towards each other - they snap, snap snap and then POP. It's easier to just let the snapping go on - than it is to sit down and admit - to your mate "You know what/ I've been a real jerk and I apologize - BECAUSE - what you're really hoping for most times is the mate to say ME TOO." and after enough of only one mate stating they are sorry and the other one stale - eventually what you get is the first mate getting the idea - YOU KNOW WHAT YOU JERK - it's NOT ALL my fault you had a hand in it to, but do you EVER apologize? Noooooooo or spouting off before the other one actualy works up the courage to say - GOSH you know what I didn't say it earlier but I've really been sharky too - and I'm sorry." (jumping the gun on them causes feelings of OH yeah - well fine tell me MORE about my problems alber switzer) So for about how long I've told you I personally didn't want to talk or see anyone and was WAY beyond sharky and snarky? Yeah well I sat down last night and told DF I don't mean to be, I don't want to direct my mouth at him or my sharpness, however I believe most of it has been, and if he's felt it, taken it that way or it actually has been? I'm very sorry, I love him, I need him, and I apologize. It took about fifteen minutes for him to come back with - ME too.....and his version of what I said only in manspeak - but had I gotten defensive or jumped the gun? I would NEVER EVER gotten his apology - and if he had never said anything? I would have just left, and been done with it for now. I really have been a bear. SOME of it? Yup things he's done - but I had to sit back and ask myself honestly - WHAT portion of what he's doing is really making me angrier - or is it just exaccerbated by my moods. With honesty as a compas for my moodometer? He really hadnot done much - he'd really been trying harder. So I gave credit for that, and thanked him. It's sparked him to do quite a lot more. I think apologizing for being Atillia the noFUN - helped a lot. I dunno J - Everyones different - I just know I don't like to be at odds with DF and I REFUSE ABSOLUTELY refuse to go to bed angry. After loosing two kids? I realize the last words I say to someone at bedtime or before departing really mean a lot. After almost loosing you? Tony should feel that way too.......He's really a good man - and you're a fine woman. Maybe you both need to remind each other ........ I'm sorry you're hurting.....butif you DO NOT bring a puppy - you should come see me. lol........NO PUPPIES or you'll go home with an EVIL CAT. [/QUOTE]
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