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General Parenting
Living with Tennage Daughter diagnosis with Borderline (BPD)
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<blockquote data-quote="DaisyFace" data-source="post: 527499" data-attributes="member: 6546"><p>Hello and Welcome--</p><p></p><p>What you are describing IS Borderline Personality Disorder. The chaos, the drama, the accusations, the manipulation, the lies - it's very hard to live with.</p><p></p><p>What has helped our family a lot is practicing very firm boundaries. For example, the foul language and constant nasty names was really an issue. Then, I stopped answering her AT ALL if there was disrespectful language. (Not the silent treatment - just not responding). difficult child quickly learned that if she wanted an answer from me - she had to speak politely. Now - does that stop the cursing if she is in a rage? Of course not - but it has greatly reduced the day-to-day bad language issues.</p><p></p><p>The lying and twisted-around stories are a HUGE part of Borderline (BPD). You need to accept that it is what it is and STOP trying to reason with her. You do NOT need to get her to agree with your point of view (especially because she likely rarely will). Know your own truth, know what is real - and stick with what you know. The more you chase her stories - the more you get drawn into the chaos and drama. Try not to argue with her - but, there's no need to agree with her lying either. Maintain your boundary!</p><p></p><p>(((hugs)))</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="DaisyFace, post: 527499, member: 6546"] Hello and Welcome-- What you are describing IS Borderline Personality Disorder. The chaos, the drama, the accusations, the manipulation, the lies - it's very hard to live with. What has helped our family a lot is practicing very firm boundaries. For example, the foul language and constant nasty names was really an issue. Then, I stopped answering her AT ALL if there was disrespectful language. (Not the silent treatment - just not responding). difficult child quickly learned that if she wanted an answer from me - she had to speak politely. Now - does that stop the cursing if she is in a rage? Of course not - but it has greatly reduced the day-to-day bad language issues. The lying and twisted-around stories are a HUGE part of Borderline (BPD). You need to accept that it is what it is and STOP trying to reason with her. You do NOT need to get her to agree with your point of view (especially because she likely rarely will). Know your own truth, know what is real - and stick with what you know. The more you chase her stories - the more you get drawn into the chaos and drama. Try not to argue with her - but, there's no need to agree with her lying either. Maintain your boundary! (((hugs))) [/QUOTE]
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Living with Tennage Daughter diagnosis with Borderline (BPD)
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