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<blockquote data-quote="DenitaS" data-source="post: 372897" data-attributes="member: 5918"><p>I think that I went through a phase of TOTAL detachment. I just shut my emotions off completely (self preservation?) Now I am trying to be somewhat available to her without getting sucked into her world. I am having a hard time deciding where the "line" goes. Food? Clothes? Rides? Phone Calls? Everything with her has to happen RIGHT NOW!! There is no, let's think about it, or here are some other options. It is her way or hell for everyone to pay. </p><p>It's just a tough line to draw. It is much easier to let go completely then be somewhat involved. I am one of those people that ABSORB other peoples energies and problems. I am still trying to learn to turn that off. Not an easy thing.</p><p></p><p>Thanks guys for sharing. I don't believe that I am enabling her anymore, maybe just not making the rules clear enough. She seems to think the rules are because I am mad at her. I just need a sense of stability in our lives that don't revolve around her and the schedule does that for me. I have this day and that time that are devoted to her (if she chooses to use them) and the rest of the time I can be "present" with my remaining family.</p><p></p><p>Does any of that make sense?</p><p></p><p>Thanks,</p><p>DS</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="DenitaS, post: 372897, member: 5918"] I think that I went through a phase of TOTAL detachment. I just shut my emotions off completely (self preservation?) Now I am trying to be somewhat available to her without getting sucked into her world. I am having a hard time deciding where the "line" goes. Food? Clothes? Rides? Phone Calls? Everything with her has to happen RIGHT NOW!! There is no, let's think about it, or here are some other options. It is her way or hell for everyone to pay. It's just a tough line to draw. It is much easier to let go completely then be somewhat involved. I am one of those people that ABSORB other peoples energies and problems. I am still trying to learn to turn that off. Not an easy thing. Thanks guys for sharing. I don't believe that I am enabling her anymore, maybe just not making the rules clear enough. She seems to think the rules are because I am mad at her. I just need a sense of stability in our lives that don't revolve around her and the schedule does that for me. I have this day and that time that are devoted to her (if she chooses to use them) and the rest of the time I can be "present" with my remaining family. Does any of that make sense? Thanks, DS [/QUOTE]
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