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Parent Support Forums
Substance Abuse
Major blow up today :(
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<blockquote data-quote="toughlovin" data-source="post: 395519"><p>Oh I so sympathize and feel for you, having been where you are. I agree with Katya about the drug use... pot shows up so at least you know he is smoking pot, which you can take as he is using drugs. You have no idea, how much, what or how often but you at least know he is smoking pot. The behavior does sound like more than pot, but who knows pot these days is much stronger and often laced with other stuff. A lot of stuff does not show up on drug tests. The other thing to be aware of is that lots of OTC medications are abused by kids.... especially watch out for some of the cough medicines such as Robitussen. I would suggest you get a lock box and lock up all OTC medications in the house.</p><p></p><p>So it sounds from his behavior, and especially the fairly quick change, that your son has a problem with drugs. That is what as a parent I think you should focus on... in terms of trying to get him some help around that. As long as he is using drugs it will be hard to address other issues.</p><p></p><p>And as awful as it is, sometimes the only real way to force our kids to get help is through the court system. It is not a great choice at all and I think it should be the last resort but it can be useful if necessary.</p><p></p><p>I don't think there is anything you could have done to prevent the blow up today. He was unreasonable. He was mad and not thinking clearly. If you gave in to his bad behavior then the message you would be sending is it is ok to behave badly to me to get what you want. You do not want to send that message. </p><p></p><p>When we kicked our son out of the house last June (he was 18 at the time so legally he did not have to live here) we did it because he literally would not follow any rules... and we realized the message we were sending by letting him live her and disobey all rules would be that that is ok... and in fact in this world it is not ok. Unfortunately for him as always he had to learn the hard way and while out of the house broke the law several times and ended up in jail.... which eventually led him to rehab.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="toughlovin, post: 395519"] Oh I so sympathize and feel for you, having been where you are. I agree with Katya about the drug use... pot shows up so at least you know he is smoking pot, which you can take as he is using drugs. You have no idea, how much, what or how often but you at least know he is smoking pot. The behavior does sound like more than pot, but who knows pot these days is much stronger and often laced with other stuff. A lot of stuff does not show up on drug tests. The other thing to be aware of is that lots of OTC medications are abused by kids.... especially watch out for some of the cough medicines such as Robitussen. I would suggest you get a lock box and lock up all OTC medications in the house. So it sounds from his behavior, and especially the fairly quick change, that your son has a problem with drugs. That is what as a parent I think you should focus on... in terms of trying to get him some help around that. As long as he is using drugs it will be hard to address other issues. And as awful as it is, sometimes the only real way to force our kids to get help is through the court system. It is not a great choice at all and I think it should be the last resort but it can be useful if necessary. I don't think there is anything you could have done to prevent the blow up today. He was unreasonable. He was mad and not thinking clearly. If you gave in to his bad behavior then the message you would be sending is it is ok to behave badly to me to get what you want. You do not want to send that message. When we kicked our son out of the house last June (he was 18 at the time so legally he did not have to live here) we did it because he literally would not follow any rules... and we realized the message we were sending by letting him live her and disobey all rules would be that that is ok... and in fact in this world it is not ok. Unfortunately for him as always he had to learn the hard way and while out of the house broke the law several times and ended up in jail.... which eventually led him to rehab. [/QUOTE]
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Substance Abuse
Major blow up today :(
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