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Hound dog

Nana's are Beautiful
Seriously, please someone take them away! /ubbthreads/images/graemlins/919Mad.gif

This school quarter is hard for me. I'm taking alot of classes, going to school all week. husband is back to work 3rd shift. T quit his job at wallie world, so he's here all day. And I swear I'm stressed to the max.

I'm bogged down in homework and studying. husband wants the house clean, laundry done, and a hot meal served to him before he goes to work. Now this is also the guy who can't decide when he wants to sleep. He goes to bed when he gets home in the mornings. Then will get up a time or 2 for awhile before going back to bed. Or sleep most of the day, then decide he needs a nap before work and goes back to bed. He's new sleeping habits have got my schedule so screwy I can't get anything done. I haven't been able to put clean laundry away since he started work. T is home all day eating the kitchen bare and leaving a mess where ever he goes and just generally aggravating everyone. N helps alot, but she can't do it all and has her own school and the baby.

Now last quarter I was a full time student, but only went to class 2 days a week. This left time for other things. Not much, but some. Plus since husband wasn't working I just handed the responsibility of the house over to him. If it got done fine, if it didn't too bad.

Now that husband is back to work, it's like he suddenly thinks I've turned into super woman or something. I'm to do several chapters of homework in each subject, cook, clean, monitor an online class, write papers out the wazzoo, study for tests, and do a mountain of laundry all at the same time with a big grin on my face. Oh, and I forgot that until recently I was also babysitting grandson Darrin on top of all that.

Good lord. No wonder I'm stressed. I'm exhausted just typing it. Ugh.

Free males anyone....... Take them Please! :wildone:
 

dreamer

New Member
No thanks. I don't want any. I have been goingnuts myself recently.
husband has not been on a regular schedule in years....worse, he wakes the kids on purpose- to play videogames- at all hours.
Oldest has always been a nite owl....and has always required little sleep per day but then crashes hard once a week or so. Mind, neither of them work or go to school.
easy child has to be to school early and she works late and needs rides back and forth for both. Her day starts at 530 am and runs most days till midnite.
SInce I amher taxi, mine does, too. Our house is SO tiny, and now 4 of us are here all the time. It is so hard to get work done. Drives me nuts.

When I was in nursing school? I stayed at school as many hours as I could, did as much of my work there as I could....and gave up on chores at home. If they are hungry, they know how to eat. If they want clean clothes----knock yourself out. Well- LOL- it did not REALLY work out that way...but.I tried.

My deepest sympathies, been there done that, it is SO hard!
 

Suz

(the future) MRS. GERE
Nope. Nope. Nope.

Sorry.

I'd like to help you but... Nope.

The girls and I have developed a lovely routine and lots of peace and quiet. You are welcome to visit! :grin:

Suz
 

timer lady

Queen of Hearts
No sale here!!! :hammer: Thanks but no thanks! :rofl:

I hate the cave man mentality - "Wife, dinner on table, NOW!" "Clean loin cloth, wife" "Where's my brain, wife?" :rofl: :rofl:

Adding in a difficult child caveman isn't helping.

I'll just keep you in my daily prayers. by the way, throw a frozen dinner at your cavemen occasionally. They will gnaw it down or use it as a popsicle. :hammer: :rofl:
 

tiredmommy

Well-Known Member
Sorry, we have two males in the house already. I need to clean kitty litter and continually brush one and walk around behind the other cleaning up. Duckie is better at putting her stuff away!
 

1905

Well-Known Member
The caveman mentality is alive and well in my house. Hey, if I didn't have a JOB I could be superwoman but I am the first one up doing chores, then after work my second job of taking care of dinner, laundry, cleaning , snacks--Calgon take me away!!! At the moment I am procrastinating cleaning my bathroom-yuck-Sunday is my big cleaning day!It sucks!-Alyssa
 

DazedandConfused

Well-Known Member
My husband wouldn't DARE say anything to me about the house being a mess. And, it usually is. If he did, I would verbally cut him off at the knees and kick his caveman rear to the moon. He's usually gone all week and some weekends. My weekday schedule is so heavy with: work, kids (feeding, getting back and forth to school, Dr appts) and now Son is playing in a youth basketball league. So that means practice and a game during the week.

I have a 37 class a week schedule at work so I'm beat at the end of the day. Plus, after moving (2nd time in two years) my library into a new building, I'm still trying to get the last of everything unpacked.

Also, did I mention that we are in the process of an addition/remodel to our home? So, that means dealing water being shut off at times, no electricity. Plus, I have had to deal with my contractor (actually a nice guy. The bonus being he's a bit intimidated by me, so I know he's really trying to do a good job) and city hall issues (what a bunch a doofuses!).

So, Cavemen avoid my house like the plague because that is exactly where they will find themselves living: A cave. :warrior:
 

Kathy813

Well-Known Member
Staff member
Dazed, I'm with you! My husband cooks, cleans and does his own laundry.

Seems like even a caveman would figure out how to cook if he got hungry enough.

:rofl:

~Kathy
 

DazedandConfused

Well-Known Member
I'm with you, Nomad

I pick up a roasted chicken(it's better than any chicken I could make) from the supermarket once a week. Make some quick rice and vegetable, or salad, and presto! Dinner.

Also when I make spagetti, I make a double batch. The leftover sauce and pasta freeze wonderfully.

I also have to give husband a plug here. Whenever he is home he does all the laundry. That includes folding and putting away. He does a fantastic job, too.
 

donna723

Well-Known Member
No thank you ... not even for free! been there done that! My son, my son-in-law, my brother and my nephews can all VISIT ... as long as they don't stay too long and as long as they don't reach for MY remote control! Took me all these years to get full access to my very own remote and nobody touches it but me! Even my pets are all girls. I have three dogs - all girls. We had four little kittens outside, one was a little male ... but he left!

I spent twenty years married to a man who considered all the work at home to be MINE, even though I worked full time and was away from home as many hours a day as he was! We'd get home from work - he'd hit the couch with a beer in his hand waiting for dinner, while I contended with two kids, cooked, cleaned, did laundry ... you know the routine. When he (very rarely) did anything around the house, it was with the attitude that he was helping ME with MY work! Well, thanks a lot, Bozo! That is just one of the many, many, MANY reasons that he is now an EX-husband.

I LOVE to see men who don't have these hangups and who willingly do their full share of whatever needs to be done around the house. My sister in law is like that! He actually cooks a little more than my daughter does, because he likes to cook and, truthfully, he's a little better at it than she is. Whichever one of them gets home first, starts dinner. If he sees something that needs to be done, he just does it, whether it's feeding the dog, vacuuming, laundry or whatever, and he doesn't consider it "helping". Bless his little heart ... it's too bad we can't clone him so everybody could have one just like him!
 

Hound dog

Nana's are Beautiful
Somehow I didn't think I'd get any takers. :rofl:

Darn. :crazy:

I was so bogged down tonite I ran out and got KFC for supper. Then husband didn't eat it. So it's sitting in the frig for the next time he asks for supper. lol

He was awake by the time I finally finished a batch of homework. He asked if he could finally talk to me. I told him next quarter, this quarter I'm too busy. :hammer: :rofl: Then disappeared into the laundry room to fold clothes.

The look on his face was priceless.

husband may have been young in the 60's, but somehow none of that caveman reform took hold. *sigh*
 

ScentofCedar

New Member
[ QUOTE ]


So, Cavemen avoid my house like the plague because that is exactly where they will find themselves living: A cave. :warrior:



[/ QUOTE ]

Dazed and Confused?

You are my hero. :laugh:

Daisylover, my husband was exactly that way when I went back to school. It is a big change for them, to see us stand up. I think it might be a little scary ~ like it is for us, sometimes.

You will get through it just fine, I think.

And how much more fun is this than it was to stay home and be the Mom?!?

How long until you graduate, Lisa?

Barbara
 

witzend

Well-Known Member
Sorry, I'd be giving husband a list of things to do while he's awake, since he can't seem to set a schedule for himself.

He knows how to run the washer and dryer, and he knows where the laundry goes when it's clean. He also knows how to do the dishes. And I wouldn't have any problem telling him that he needs to sweep and mop today, or vacuum, or whatever small chore just didn't get done and you need help with.

Beyond that, if he won't help and is having troubles setting a reasonable sleep time for himself, I would set the sleep time for him by doing what you usually need to do during a regularly scheduled 4-5 hour time during the day. Not to say that you're going to work around the house 4 -5 hours, but hey - there's 24 hours in a day, he works 8 of them, travel to and from work can't be more than an hour each way, that leaves him 14 hours to sleep. He should be able to stay awake for a regularly scheduled 4 hours to give you time to do what you need to do without worrying about his sleep. Figuring out how to sleep odd hours is a part of the new position. He needs to step up and stop letting the family take the hit because life changed for him.

He needs to help around the house some, too. It's not your job to wait on him!
 

Hound dog

Nana's are Beautiful
Barbara

From this program, phlebotomy, I graduate in June. But I'm not so sure if I'm going to stop there. lol Although I haven't quite decided what I'd like to go for next. Now that I've finally got the opportunity to go to college, I'm like a kid in a candy store with a handful of money. :rofl:

And you're right. This is a big change for husband. For 23 yrs I've held down the fort while he worked and got spoiled.

Witz

After a bit more time I'll start doing my chores and such around him and his sleep schedule. This is an almost 60 yr old man getting used to working 3rd shift for the first time in about 30 yrs or more. An he has a hour + travel time each way. It's just hard to work around him while he's settling into a routine.
 

Kathy813

Well-Known Member
Staff member
Witz's post reminded me of something that happened years ago.

I went to visit a neighbor who had just come home that day after having a baby. I found her in the laundry room bent over an overflowing basket of laundry in obvious pain. I asked her what in the world she was doing and she said that she had to catch up on her laundry.

I asked her why her husband wasn't doing the laundry and she said that "he didn't know how."

I reminded her that he had a Ph.D in physics and surely could figure out how a washing machine worked.

:rofl:

I can't stand when men use ignorance as an excuse!

Daisy, I hope your husband can see that it would only be fair to take up some of the slack now that you have gone back to school.

~Kathy
 

donna723

Well-Known Member
Ironing was one chore that my ex- always considered to be "beneath him" ... he would never admit it but he saw it as "womens work" - something that I should be doing FOR him! :cool: Yeah, right! Maybe if things had been different between us (he was a total :censored2:!), or maybe if he had pulled his share of the chores in other areas, but he was a dedicated "couch sitter"! He considered himself too good to iron, but of course, not me! It was a "subserviant" thing. Therefore, H#ll would have frozen over before I would have ironed his darned shirts! It was the principal of the thing!

He tried to use that lame old "I don't know how" excuse on me too! My answer to that was always, "Are you too stupid to learn?" There is NO good answer to that question!!! :grin: At work, they always referred to him as "the guy in the wrinkled uniform"! Didn't bother me one bit!

:rofl:
 
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