Manster Not Happy with Me

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by ML, Dec 3, 2009.

  1. ML

    ML Guest

    Manster was telling me this morning how his teacher thinks he needs extra time on CSEAP, the state testing they go through annually. I explained how a few years ago when he was having some challenge, I requested that he have more time. This is part of his 504. He was pretty upset with me. He started tearing up and said “it’s sure nice to know how much you believe in me”. He wants absolutely nothing to do with anything that singles him out for extra services or attention.

    Frankly I’m sure he doesn’t need this extra time and I have a call in to the teacher about it. If anything he needs a reminder to take his time and think things through. He’s always in a hurry just to get it done and as a result makes careless mistakes. I suppose it’s time to revisit the 504.

    Does anyone else have this resistance to special accommodations with their kids?
  2. JJJ

    JJJ Active Member

    Yep. Piglet --who is never a problem in school -- refused to go to the alternate testing room when she was a 4th grader. She just said "no thank you" and sat there. They were stunned as she had never refused a teacher direction before. They called me and we agreed to leave her in the main room and the teacher would just give her a few extra prompts when she could. Her scores tanked so the next year she was back in the alternate room but she argues every year to not have to go. She doesn't understand that starting in 8th grade these tests mean so much (course options for high school, college admission, etc).
  3. aeroeng

    aeroeng Mom of Three

    Yep. easy child absolutely hates and refuses any kind of special accommodations. He won't even except extra help from the teacher or tutors. He refuses the extra test time, and will not leave the class room to be pulled away. He also has significant troubles recording his homework assignments. As a result he is failing almost everything. He is in a privet high school, and may get invited to go somewhere else next year. husband and I find this extremely frustrating. I have even approved the desperate plan for homework.

    The desperate plan is having his younger brother, (recovering difficult child) go around to his teachers after school and record what easy child's homework is. At first I was resistant to this approach as I thought easy child would be have troubles with his peers having his younger brother checking up on him. But now that I am desperate, a little peer pressure might be a good thing.

    You may wonder why easy child is a easy child and not a difficult child. It's because I am on this site because of son# 2's major anger issues. easy child has learning disabilities but behaves very well, clam and fun to be around. A very pleasant person. Son#2 has changed from difficult child to "recovering difficult child" because he is truly trying to improve, but does not always make it.
  4. jbrain

    jbrain Member

    My easy child/difficult child 2 was good about using her accommodations and didn't seem to have negative feelings about herself from the Special Education status. My difficult child 1, on the other hand, decided it meant she was stupid. In her case I wish we had never gone that route--she didn't use the accommodations and the more "help" she received the more helpless she became. We worked so hard to try to help her and so did the school. If I could do it over I would just have let the chips fall where they may--couldn't have had any worse outcome anyway. But, I'm not saying that's what you should do!!! Just relating my experience...
  5. tiredmommy

    tiredmommy Site Moderator

    Yes... Duckie resisted Occupational Therapist (OT) and will suffer an asthma attack in gym before she asks to see the nurse. :(
  6. ML

    ML Guest

    Thanks all. The day got better. Manster had a great time at this orchestra performance tonight. After just 3 months of learning these instruments these kids actually sounded great.

    I'm going to adapt this 504 to focus the supports on less obvious ways. Wish me luck!