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<blockquote data-quote="Jena" data-source="post: 422353" data-attributes="member: 4514"><p>lol and than email me it too PLEASE!! <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" /></p><p> </p><p>one thing i can say for sure today i thought about it was i was cleaning hoardville is that we have solved some issues........</p><p> </p><p>we solved the ex problem - she has been blocked for 3 weeks now. the level of frustration due to her has decreased it's non existant. she's working thru manipulating kids now re being blocked yet we talk to kids and we ignore. she's beginning to learn to talk to him like a person upon pick up and drop off. he said who knew we could live this way. (also gives him time in therapy to work thru junk she left him with without her creeping up his you know what).</p><p> </p><p>we stood together and handled easy child issue. didn't want to yet came to agreement on how to proceed. we have. he catches me when i fall and want to go grab her.</p><p> </p><p>we also work together on difficult child as far as what to do next, he's been a good sounding board for me regarding medications, school etc.</p><p> </p><p>he's worked with me on where to live, first we went searching thru new neighborhood than i said ok let's stay here so he bought ton of flowers (the tiny ones lol) so i could plant and enhance here.</p><p> </p><p>he's caught himself and i've caught him at least 2x on being respectful during frustrating times and finding his words and explaining his feelings without getting defensive. he's caught me too quite a few times being short and nasty and ive reigned it in.</p><p> </p><p>he's wants to go away in summer for our honeymoon. get away for 4 days just us a reprieve already picked the place, figuring out how to pay for it and trying to arrange with ex when he can take difficult child.</p><p> </p><p>the work schedule and me not feeling well is a challenge. its his own personal work to understand nights i dont' want to "be with him" it isnt' person i'm just hurting and tired and he needs to learn to respect that and not have a meltdown due to getting hurt (thats where the ex junk comes in)</p><p> </p><p>together we've figured out thru talking how to proceed with business sale, what will work, what wont' work. also him now learning to draw boundaries with his dad that he's never done before in his life! his dad walks all over him.</p><p> </p><p>hes' also stated that even though affording me riding each week at 50 a pop he wants to continue affording it because he said i need it, the time alone is crucial and i return so much happier than when i left.</p><p> </p><p>he also agreed to make more of an effort on family days days he's off to spend time with me and kids. the other night we did movie nite with them.</p><p> </p><p>our next hurdle is easter.. we're both nervous if easy child shows and stepdaughter older one shows there might be a war. their both loose cannons right now adn ready to explode at moments notice. so we sat down and came up with a plan if it does occur.</p><p> </p><p>as far as past goes, i choice to stay after i caught him texting the waitress and the old friend of his over two years ago now. that was my choice to forgive him. i bring it up all the time. he said i have never lived this down. i also dont' check his phone anymore i'm slowly learning to trust a man. not easy for me.</p><p> </p><p>so all in all i guess we're making some progress and i should flip glass the other way fora bit. <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" /></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Jena, post: 422353, member: 4514"] lol and than email me it too PLEASE!! :) one thing i can say for sure today i thought about it was i was cleaning hoardville is that we have solved some issues........ we solved the ex problem - she has been blocked for 3 weeks now. the level of frustration due to her has decreased it's non existant. she's working thru manipulating kids now re being blocked yet we talk to kids and we ignore. she's beginning to learn to talk to him like a person upon pick up and drop off. he said who knew we could live this way. (also gives him time in therapy to work thru junk she left him with without her creeping up his you know what). we stood together and handled easy child issue. didn't want to yet came to agreement on how to proceed. we have. he catches me when i fall and want to go grab her. we also work together on difficult child as far as what to do next, he's been a good sounding board for me regarding medications, school etc. he's worked with me on where to live, first we went searching thru new neighborhood than i said ok let's stay here so he bought ton of flowers (the tiny ones lol) so i could plant and enhance here. he's caught himself and i've caught him at least 2x on being respectful during frustrating times and finding his words and explaining his feelings without getting defensive. he's caught me too quite a few times being short and nasty and ive reigned it in. he's wants to go away in summer for our honeymoon. get away for 4 days just us a reprieve already picked the place, figuring out how to pay for it and trying to arrange with ex when he can take difficult child. the work schedule and me not feeling well is a challenge. its his own personal work to understand nights i dont' want to "be with him" it isnt' person i'm just hurting and tired and he needs to learn to respect that and not have a meltdown due to getting hurt (thats where the ex junk comes in) together we've figured out thru talking how to proceed with business sale, what will work, what wont' work. also him now learning to draw boundaries with his dad that he's never done before in his life! his dad walks all over him. hes' also stated that even though affording me riding each week at 50 a pop he wants to continue affording it because he said i need it, the time alone is crucial and i return so much happier than when i left. he also agreed to make more of an effort on family days days he's off to spend time with me and kids. the other night we did movie nite with them. our next hurdle is easter.. we're both nervous if easy child shows and stepdaughter older one shows there might be a war. their both loose cannons right now adn ready to explode at moments notice. so we sat down and came up with a plan if it does occur. as far as past goes, i choice to stay after i caught him texting the waitress and the old friend of his over two years ago now. that was my choice to forgive him. i bring it up all the time. he said i have never lived this down. i also dont' check his phone anymore i'm slowly learning to trust a man. not easy for me. so all in all i guess we're making some progress and i should flip glass the other way fora bit. :) [/QUOTE]
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