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Masturbation, anxiety and more...
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<blockquote data-quote="hearts and roses" data-source="post: 115579" data-attributes="member: 2211"><p>Hmmm, regarding the masturbation: My easy child did this for a while when she was between 3-7. I would tell her it was a private thing that she could do in private only, in her room. She was okay with that. When she was around 6 or so she kept sliding down the stair banister and I ws playing around and said, "I know you're being silly. I'm afraid you could fall. Please don't do that anymore" and she responded by telling me, "But it feels so good...you know...down there" and I almost died on the spot! I asked her her pediatrician about it and he said that's not that uncommon for kids to 'hit on that spot' at an early age, discover it feels nice, and then find ways of getting that thrill again. If it's interferring with her normal day and routine, then it's an issue, but to simply instruct her to do that in private and try to redirect her if it's interferring with her regular routine and that should clear it up - do not make an issue out of it so she will use it just to bug me. I followed his advice and she settled down after a while. If she did it a lot after that, I wouldn't know, as I still believe that if that was her coping mechanism and as long as she did it in private and it didn't rule her every moment, then it's okay. My easy child went on to be a prude and was not sexually promiscuous in any way. </p><p></p><p>Incidentally, my easy child was always also very sensitive to tags, socks, panties, all clothing, etc. She wouldn't wear undies until she was nearly 9 years old. She cut tags out of all her clothing. She wouldn't wear jeans until she was in 7th grade - she didn't like the way they felt. And she wouldn't wear anything but those short little tight gym socks all year - still won't wear anything but. </p><p></p><p>Aside from all that, she's fine. She is driven, smart, focused and socially normal as far as I can see. </p><p></p><p>on the other hand, difficult child was mortified when the topic of masturbation came up when we discussed her periods and sexuality way back. And she's the one who is more sexually promiscuous - always has been. </p><p></p><p>I sometimes think parents make too much out of the masturbation thing. It's their bodies and as long as it's done in private and they are made to understand that it's a personal, private thing, not to be done in excess, then so what. </p><p></p><p>My friend's 8 year old daughter calls it "humpies" and she will even ask her mom, "Can I go to my room and do humpies?" She has learned to do it in private. This child has had a lot of medical issues since she was born and the humpies was a means of coping.</p><p></p><p>Bottom line: If your gut is telling you that her behavior is not normal, then by all means have her evaluated, but in the case of the masturbation, other than telling her to do it in private, try to ignore it. The more you make of it, the worse it will get.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="hearts and roses, post: 115579, member: 2211"] Hmmm, regarding the masturbation: My easy child did this for a while when she was between 3-7. I would tell her it was a private thing that she could do in private only, in her room. She was okay with that. When she was around 6 or so she kept sliding down the stair banister and I ws playing around and said, "I know you're being silly. I'm afraid you could fall. Please don't do that anymore" and she responded by telling me, "But it feels so good...you know...down there" and I almost died on the spot! I asked her her pediatrician about it and he said that's not that uncommon for kids to 'hit on that spot' at an early age, discover it feels nice, and then find ways of getting that thrill again. If it's interferring with her normal day and routine, then it's an issue, but to simply instruct her to do that in private and try to redirect her if it's interferring with her regular routine and that should clear it up - do not make an issue out of it so she will use it just to bug me. I followed his advice and she settled down after a while. If she did it a lot after that, I wouldn't know, as I still believe that if that was her coping mechanism and as long as she did it in private and it didn't rule her every moment, then it's okay. My easy child went on to be a prude and was not sexually promiscuous in any way. Incidentally, my easy child was always also very sensitive to tags, socks, panties, all clothing, etc. She wouldn't wear undies until she was nearly 9 years old. She cut tags out of all her clothing. She wouldn't wear jeans until she was in 7th grade - she didn't like the way they felt. And she wouldn't wear anything but those short little tight gym socks all year - still won't wear anything but. Aside from all that, she's fine. She is driven, smart, focused and socially normal as far as I can see. on the other hand, difficult child was mortified when the topic of masturbation came up when we discussed her periods and sexuality way back. And she's the one who is more sexually promiscuous - always has been. I sometimes think parents make too much out of the masturbation thing. It's their bodies and as long as it's done in private and they are made to understand that it's a personal, private thing, not to be done in excess, then so what. My friend's 8 year old daughter calls it "humpies" and she will even ask her mom, "Can I go to my room and do humpies?" She has learned to do it in private. This child has had a lot of medical issues since she was born and the humpies was a means of coping. Bottom line: If your gut is telling you that her behavior is not normal, then by all means have her evaluated, but in the case of the masturbation, other than telling her to do it in private, try to ignore it. The more you make of it, the worse it will get. [/QUOTE]
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