I'm just wanting to share with someone and am weary of supplying the reality-show type stories to my friends. I have a couple of good friends who know everything about my family, but neither of them have a difficult child, so they're sympathetic, but I just feel weird bringing up all this stuff with them. And I think I'll spare my mom and dad, who I have likewise shared everything. I got a call at 3 a.m. from daughter (age 21) who said to come and get her from the ER. I said "what happened" and she said she had a busted lip but was OK. My daughter-in-law was there with her but the doctor wouldn't let her go home with anyone but a parent. Which is kind-of weird since she's 21, but whatever. Husband and I raced there and the doctor wanted to talk to us first. He said she had come in an ambulance from the university (she's a senior), and she had been pushed by her boyfriend during an argument. She was extremely drunk and had been fighting with the ambulance drivers, doctors, nurses, and her sister-in-law. He said he didn't think her injuries were serious, but normally he would want to do a scan to make sure there was no further head injury. He wanted our permission to skip that scan because he had to consider the safety of his staff! The only way he could do a scan is if he sedated her, which he said was also an unnecessary risk in his opinion. He was super helpful and nice. He said if we didn't want her to go with us or thought we couldn't handle her, we could tell him and he had the authority to keep her overnight. When we got to see her, she wasn't fighting anyone but kept talking about how horrible the hospital is and how she never wants to go there again. My daughter-in-law left. There was a young man from the university with her, as I guess is their policy. He told her she'd be getting a call from their wellness center to follow up. The nurse signed her out and they put on the report that she had acute alcohol ingestion and the lip injry. As we got into our car, I told my daughter, "It looks like you might want to lay off the alcohol for a while." Well, that was the wrong thing to say. I got to hear how I don't support her, she's entitled to drink whenever she wants to, it didn't excuse that her boyfriend pushed her, we're blaming the victim, we're re-victimizing her, etc. I didn't say much to her the rest of the way home, just realizing she wasn't thinking straight. She went to sleep right away at our house. She called me this morning and said she found out that her boyfriend had been arrested and had to post bond. She was crying and said she didn't know how all this happened and she didn't want him to be arrested. Then she continued with how horrible the doctor was. Somehow I feel like she's not taking any responsibility for her actions. We don't know the whole story, but I'm imagining that they were drunk and arguing, she got in his face (literally) and he pushed her away. I've seen her get physical with her brothers before, and I know she's not the delicate flower she wants people to believe at times. Of course I'm not excusing him for pushing her, but I'm just wondering how it got to this point with her. She had another bad relationship that ended with her filing for a restraining order, but I really thought this new guy seemed a lot nicer. I don't know how much of it was her or him. She was a model student through high school and has managed to keep her scholarship at least in college, but she's becoming rather a mess and I'm feeling like I was under an illusion of being a good mom after all these years. One son is still addicted to heroin, one son is young and irresponsible (the one who has to go to court on Tuesday), and now her. (sorry, I'm having a pity party) Again, just venting and thanks the shoulder to sigh on.