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Mentally unstable cleaner - update
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<blockquote data-quote="Marguerite" data-source="post: 126069" data-attributes="member: 1991"><p>I think you may be misunderstanding me. Yes, we have been friends since well before he began to work for the agency. But not overly close friends. I've never mothered him, but we have enjoyed talking. At times he's talked and I haven't enjoyed it, he's been a bit of a thorn in my side when he starts tubthumping. I've come to the conclusion that he has an addictive personality - I know he used drugs back in the 70s (nothing major) and I think he has substituted religion as his addiction. He really doesn't seem to understand what he really believes in, but it's something where someone tells him what he should be thinking and he has embraced it wholeheartedly and is "an authority". I've been a bit fed up with it for some time; but now, he's agreeing with my views (strange).</p><p></p><p>I went down a similar road with a friend I met when she interviewed me for a freelance paper article a few years ago. She became increasingly strange especially on topics of religion until I finally had to distance myself. She told me she has been diagnosed with schizo-affective disorder. I still cross paths with her occasionally - she greets me as a long-lost friend.</p><p></p><p>I'm not trying to counsel him or 'treat' him in any way; frankly, I want him gone (but somewhere safe, for him). He needs help and won't be getting it if he's only talking to his (very unqualified) 'pastor'.</p><p></p><p>I've been feeling manipulated when he 'confesses' things to me, so I do my best to not give him a pay-off. I'm god at not reacting (openly) but inwardly, he has me rattled.</p><p></p><p>The agency - it's government-based, providing a subsidised service (much sought after) for people with a disability. The service can be variable - he's one of the worst. He began with absolutely no idea, I feel like I've trained him, but he now at least does SOME things that help, I'd be stuck without either him or a replacement. The service is so much in demand that if I cancel, I'll never get it back. it's like giving up your spot in the waiting line for tickets to a Madonna concert.</p><p></p><p>What I'm trying to do now - prepare. Plan. Have some idea of what is happening in his head, so I can either pull the plug on him (if I have to, for my safety and of the others he does service for) or simply wait it out and be aware he's likely to forget to plug the fish tank heater back in (he killed a tank full of fish a few years ago by unplugging the heater to run the vacuum cleaner, and then not plugging it back in).</p><p></p><p>I'm sure a lot of you have DEXs like him. </p><p></p><p>If it were just him being 'thick', I could put up with it. I HAVE put up with it. </p><p></p><p>At this stage after talking to my paralegal friend (who also knows him and his wife) we're fairly sure there's no danger at the moment. He's too much of a coward and pacifist to ever attack anyone. </p><p></p><p>I guess I'm fed up with having to hold his hand and chaperone him around my house, when I really need to be resting. And now he seems to be doing things so totally 'out there' (such as the indecent exposure stuff) I just don't know what to expect, and it's making me nervous.</p><p></p><p>I'll try to swap my days this week, I need to go into hospital and I'll be booking it tomorrow morning. After that, I might see if I can swap days to a day when he simply isn't available (I tried this before - didn't work) with the hope that I can get transferred to the other worker in the village. But if that doesn't work, and he gets increasingly weird, I'm going to have to tell the agency, I think. I'm just scared they'll talk to him about it and he will know who told them. I REALLY don't want that! Long before it gets to that stage, I think I would prefer talking to his wife to find out if he's just putting on a 'show' for me, or if he's really being weird at home as well.</p><p></p><p>Here's hoping he gets himself some help fast.</p><p></p><p>Marg</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Marguerite, post: 126069, member: 1991"] I think you may be misunderstanding me. Yes, we have been friends since well before he began to work for the agency. But not overly close friends. I've never mothered him, but we have enjoyed talking. At times he's talked and I haven't enjoyed it, he's been a bit of a thorn in my side when he starts tubthumping. I've come to the conclusion that he has an addictive personality - I know he used drugs back in the 70s (nothing major) and I think he has substituted religion as his addiction. He really doesn't seem to understand what he really believes in, but it's something where someone tells him what he should be thinking and he has embraced it wholeheartedly and is "an authority". I've been a bit fed up with it for some time; but now, he's agreeing with my views (strange). I went down a similar road with a friend I met when she interviewed me for a freelance paper article a few years ago. She became increasingly strange especially on topics of religion until I finally had to distance myself. She told me she has been diagnosed with schizo-affective disorder. I still cross paths with her occasionally - she greets me as a long-lost friend. I'm not trying to counsel him or 'treat' him in any way; frankly, I want him gone (but somewhere safe, for him). He needs help and won't be getting it if he's only talking to his (very unqualified) 'pastor'. I've been feeling manipulated when he 'confesses' things to me, so I do my best to not give him a pay-off. I'm god at not reacting (openly) but inwardly, he has me rattled. The agency - it's government-based, providing a subsidised service (much sought after) for people with a disability. The service can be variable - he's one of the worst. He began with absolutely no idea, I feel like I've trained him, but he now at least does SOME things that help, I'd be stuck without either him or a replacement. The service is so much in demand that if I cancel, I'll never get it back. it's like giving up your spot in the waiting line for tickets to a Madonna concert. What I'm trying to do now - prepare. Plan. Have some idea of what is happening in his head, so I can either pull the plug on him (if I have to, for my safety and of the others he does service for) or simply wait it out and be aware he's likely to forget to plug the fish tank heater back in (he killed a tank full of fish a few years ago by unplugging the heater to run the vacuum cleaner, and then not plugging it back in). I'm sure a lot of you have DEXs like him. If it were just him being 'thick', I could put up with it. I HAVE put up with it. At this stage after talking to my paralegal friend (who also knows him and his wife) we're fairly sure there's no danger at the moment. He's too much of a coward and pacifist to ever attack anyone. I guess I'm fed up with having to hold his hand and chaperone him around my house, when I really need to be resting. And now he seems to be doing things so totally 'out there' (such as the indecent exposure stuff) I just don't know what to expect, and it's making me nervous. I'll try to swap my days this week, I need to go into hospital and I'll be booking it tomorrow morning. After that, I might see if I can swap days to a day when he simply isn't available (I tried this before - didn't work) with the hope that I can get transferred to the other worker in the village. But if that doesn't work, and he gets increasingly weird, I'm going to have to tell the agency, I think. I'm just scared they'll talk to him about it and he will know who told them. I REALLY don't want that! Long before it gets to that stage, I think I would prefer talking to his wife to find out if he's just putting on a 'show' for me, or if he's really being weird at home as well. Here's hoping he gets himself some help fast. Marg [/QUOTE]
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