met my friend's new boyfriend

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by amazeofgrace, Dec 2, 2008.

  1. amazeofgrace

    amazeofgrace New Member

    she's not even divorced yet and she and her 3 kids moved in with him 3 days b4 her custody hearing. he's been divorced twice and has full custody of his 2 boys, so "they're one big happy family" within 5 months time, ok I am trying not to judge, but when she went to the custody hearing she got very upset that the mediator reemed her for moving an hour away into her boyfriend's house. Her X gets the kids (4 & 8) every weekend and 8 weeks out of the summer!!! She's hystericall, her X really is a weeny, but come on DUH!!!! It wasn't like she was homeless or in mortal danger she should have waited to move!

    So any way I meet the boyfriend, actually she said she was coming over for coffee and surprise boyfriend is with her, not only with her, but up her butt all night! He kept talking and says "she will", "she's going to", we will". Let's just say I saw 100 red flags within 5 minutes!

    Now she's upset because I asked her on the phone "if she feels suffocated"? Lord knows I was gasping for air by the end of the visit!

    thank you for anyone who actually read that rant, but I am worried about my friend, her X was a weeny but this guy seems like a sociopath!

    PS: this guy has been divorced twice and was dismissed from the Marine due to allegations of abuse by his second wife, he of course says she abused him.......
     
    Last edited: Dec 2, 2008
  2. mrscatinthehat

    mrscatinthehat Seussical

    Wow. It can be hard to watch our friends do some really crazy things. I know I have one that I have to almost sever my tongue from making certain comments about. However the only thing you really can do is just be there to support her. It is her decision. Blech it is awful to say it but we can't do anything but be there for our friends.

    hugs
    beth
     
  3. goldenguru

    goldenguru New Member

    Well if it were my BFF, I would speak truth to her - at least once.

    I have a BFF who has had a thing off and on with- a married guy. It is wrong on SOOOOO many levels. I have (in love) shared what I think a time or two. She has continued. I no longer say anything. I just nod alot.

    Part of being a true friend is sometimes saying the hard things in my opinion. And then, just standing by and waiting to help our friends pick up the pieces.
     
  4. Star*

    Star* call 911........call 911

    Since I practiced what I preach I will preach.......

    It's NOT the men that she goes out with that are the problem here. It is her. And if you pick a man, or go with a man or STAY with a man that is a weenie (as you politely put it) or make EXCUSES because of the behavior he exhibits? YOU NEED COUNSELING AFTER THAT RELATIONSHIP to get your SELF ESTEEM back and REALIZE
    1. WHY DO YOU CONTINUALLY PICK WEENIES
    2. WHY YOU DO NOT THINK YOU'LL LIKE MEN THAT TREAT WOMEN NICE
    3. DONT" WANT A MAN WITHOUT THAT BAD BOY IMAGE
    4. THINK YOU CAN CHANGE A MAN'S BEHAVIOR
    5. THINK IF YOU GET OUT of the BAD relationship that things will just POOf be right on your NEXT (slap my head) relationship.

    there are exceptions.......but the chances of HER being it? ZERO.

    Sorry - point her to some DV counseling and hang on - it's going to be a rocky ride IF you allow her to drag you into the drama...mamma...lamah...bahama...banaaanah...okay the last one was a stretch.

    Hugs
    Star
     
Loading...