Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
Mini-vent
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="klmno" data-source="post: 259451" data-attributes="member: 3699"><p>Oh, he definitely can be manipulative, but I believe what he says on this one. Mainly because I did speak to this lady after court and the only other mental health person there was the one teleconferenced in during team meetings with psychiatric hospital and I heard her attitutde first-hand. They are clearly Department of Juvenile Justice people, not mental health people, even if they have the role of counselor.</p><p></p><p>Anyway- the word "punishment" was mine, not hers. difficult child said he was trying to talk to her about suicidal thoughts (I don't know if he meant 'talk in general' or if he was saying he'd actually had them), and she told him that if he reported suicidal thinking there, they would not tdo him again but would lock him in a room by himself with no clothes or bedding. That is about his worst nightmare, and a punishment in my mind. She had told me that they were not going to tdo him again. difficult child said the reason she gave him was that 1) if the psychiatric hospital could have helped him, he still wouldn't be feeling that way and 2) the psychiatric hospital discharged him so he must not need to be there.</p><p></p><p>eeky- it might be difficult for someone who isn't a parent to understand this, but if everyone except the parent is telling a kid that his only problems are his mom's fault, it makes it a little difficult for that mom to be an effective parent and leaves the door wide open for the kid to manipulate and play one against the other. difficult child knew this was the PO's position for a long time and had gotten to a point where he would refuse to mind me at home because he knew the po would blame me, not him. It's not like he's an adult now- he plans to come back home after his release so if he comes back home after having more people try to convince him everything is just my fault, we would have even more problems.</p><p></p><p>I know they have a "suicide room" and that is what it is for. I don't think he is suicidal right now though- now what happens when he's transferred to some place worse, I don't know. </p><p></p><p>There are several, at least, in Department of Juvenile Justice they don't believe in mental health issues in kids and just believe kids need a swift kick in the butt. My bro is that way also and this could explain some people believing him more than me. Plus, I think there are some that thinnk I taught him to 'play" suicidal or mentally ill to avoid consequences- intentionally. The PO had said difficult child had only been cutting (from Dec thru Feb) to manipulate me and that it was no big deal. She told me to ignore the cutting and any talk of suicide. I can tell you that when I was a teen, my mother was that way with me.</p><p></p><p>What seems odd to me though is that if these people believe that way and think the MI is just an excuse, why did they make sure he got ordered to get it? - although that wasn't PO's doing. Anyway, I have only been trying to follow what mental health profs told me- maybe it is wrong- maybe difficult child doesn't have MI but just needs Department of Juvenile Justice's behavior mod- I sincerely hope they are right and that this "cures" him. </p><p></p><p>He's showing signs of anxiety in there, but his behavior has been really good the past 2 weeks. He usually talks about things going on in detention at visitation- no sob stories or arguing. Once he gets transferred, they don't make him take his medications. I'm suppoorting Department of Juvenile Justice's behavior mod while he's in there. If this works, then there are several psychiatrist's and therapist's that have been wrong- I just wish they wouldn't blame me for all this and acknowledge that I've just been trying to follow what they've said. If he continues to keep his cool and behave well, I'm going to talk to them about taking him off all medications.</p><p></p><p>I think he should go to some transitional place when he gets out, before coming home. But I have such a label on me right now, they won't consider anything I have to say. And, I don't think they have a transitional place for 14yo's. It's my understanding that if a kid that age can't go home right away, he goes into dss.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="klmno, post: 259451, member: 3699"] Oh, he definitely can be manipulative, but I believe what he says on this one. Mainly because I did speak to this lady after court and the only other mental health person there was the one teleconferenced in during team meetings with psychiatric hospital and I heard her attitutde first-hand. They are clearly Department of Juvenile Justice people, not mental health people, even if they have the role of counselor. Anyway- the word "punishment" was mine, not hers. difficult child said he was trying to talk to her about suicidal thoughts (I don't know if he meant 'talk in general' or if he was saying he'd actually had them), and she told him that if he reported suicidal thinking there, they would not tdo him again but would lock him in a room by himself with no clothes or bedding. That is about his worst nightmare, and a punishment in my mind. She had told me that they were not going to tdo him again. difficult child said the reason she gave him was that 1) if the psychiatric hospital could have helped him, he still wouldn't be feeling that way and 2) the psychiatric hospital discharged him so he must not need to be there. eeky- it might be difficult for someone who isn't a parent to understand this, but if everyone except the parent is telling a kid that his only problems are his mom's fault, it makes it a little difficult for that mom to be an effective parent and leaves the door wide open for the kid to manipulate and play one against the other. difficult child knew this was the PO's position for a long time and had gotten to a point where he would refuse to mind me at home because he knew the po would blame me, not him. It's not like he's an adult now- he plans to come back home after his release so if he comes back home after having more people try to convince him everything is just my fault, we would have even more problems. I know they have a "suicide room" and that is what it is for. I don't think he is suicidal right now though- now what happens when he's transferred to some place worse, I don't know. There are several, at least, in Department of Juvenile Justice they don't believe in mental health issues in kids and just believe kids need a swift kick in the butt. My bro is that way also and this could explain some people believing him more than me. Plus, I think there are some that thinnk I taught him to 'play" suicidal or mentally ill to avoid consequences- intentionally. The PO had said difficult child had only been cutting (from Dec thru Feb) to manipulate me and that it was no big deal. She told me to ignore the cutting and any talk of suicide. I can tell you that when I was a teen, my mother was that way with me. What seems odd to me though is that if these people believe that way and think the MI is just an excuse, why did they make sure he got ordered to get it? - although that wasn't PO's doing. Anyway, I have only been trying to follow what mental health profs told me- maybe it is wrong- maybe difficult child doesn't have MI but just needs Department of Juvenile Justice's behavior mod- I sincerely hope they are right and that this "cures" him. He's showing signs of anxiety in there, but his behavior has been really good the past 2 weeks. He usually talks about things going on in detention at visitation- no sob stories or arguing. Once he gets transferred, they don't make him take his medications. I'm suppoorting Department of Juvenile Justice's behavior mod while he's in there. If this works, then there are several psychiatrist's and therapist's that have been wrong- I just wish they wouldn't blame me for all this and acknowledge that I've just been trying to follow what they've said. If he continues to keep his cool and behave well, I'm going to talk to them about taking him off all medications. I think he should go to some transitional place when he gets out, before coming home. But I have such a label on me right now, they won't consider anything I have to say. And, I don't think they have a transitional place for 14yo's. It's my understanding that if a kid that age can't go home right away, he goes into dss. [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
Mini-vent
Top