Mom of Pot Head

Discussion in 'Substance Abuse' started by camsworriedmom, Jul 4, 2014.

  1. camsworriedmom

    camsworriedmom New Member

    I never thought this would happen to me and that I'd be writing about my 17 year old Pot Head. I've known he smoked pot with his friends now for about a year, but now it has entered an entire new level. His 19 year old friend has a medical marijuana card so he has easy access. He just received $150 from his grandma for his birthday and purchased a bong with it and of course marijuana. During school, he was smoking mostly on weekends (I think) but now that it is summer I can tell he is stoned every day. He denies it. I'm shocked at the paraphernalia he has. I've been reading several blogs on this site today about suggestions on what to do. Besides the need to set down rules, I am thinking I start by making him go talk to someone. He doesn't feel he has a problem and when I suggest this he says no way. But I figure now is the time before he is an adult in one year. Can anyone suggest what type of counselor, therapist, etc. I should look for? I'm really worried about his future. Oh, he also has ADHD, which was diagnosed when he was a freshman. He told me he'll be able to get a medical marijuana card when he is 18 because of this. I could go on and on. I am so stressed out. Thank you!
  2. Kathy813

    Kathy813 Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Hi camsworriedmom and welcome to the CD board. As we like to say . . . sorry that you needed to find us but glad that you did.

    I am amazed to hear that a diagnosis of ADHD qualifies as a reason to get medical marijuana.

    It does sound like your son has a problem that has gone beyond simple experimentation with pot. I would look for a therapist that specializes in addiction and substance abuse. I suggest going to an NarAnon or AlAnon meeting and asking around for names. Families of loved ones with substance abuse issues will have had plenty of experience with doctors and therapists that have treated their family members.

    Another suggestion is to call your local NAMI group and ask for names of therapists that specialize in addiction. Many of our loved ones with a mental illness also have substance abuse issues. When I mentioned the name of a psychiatrist my daughter had gone to during a NAMI meeting, there was a communal groan as he was known as being a pill pusher. He gave my addict daughter prescriptions for benzos and ambien. I wish I had known that about him before she went.

    The bottom line is that there are good therapists and psychiatrists and bad therapists and psychiatrists. You need to be very careful in who you send your son to.

    You many not get many responses today because of the holiday but others will be along with advice and support.

  3. Childofmine

    Childofmine trying to do this thing one day at a time Staff Member

    Mom, welcome...since he is 17 you still have a lot of control...until he turns 18. Use it. Get a substance abuse assessment and then a psychological work up. Call around and find out who does these in your community and get some good references for each. Will likely be two different people. Depending on what they say take the next steps to insist on treatment. Start setting down clear boundaries and rules for the use of your car, money, curfew etc. Stick to whatever you say. Pot is not a benign drug and I fear its continued use and prevalence in this country.

    Then as some have said already, start working on you. You need a lot of support and help in dealing with this.

    Don't let him or others muddy the water. He does not need to be using illegal drugs for any reason under any circumstances. Period.

    Keep posting here and keep reading here. Warm hugs. We get it and we care.

    Sent using ConductDisorders mobile app
  4. Annie2007

    Annie2007 Member

    Yes do it because when he turns 18, it is a whole different story. Because of HIPPA laws, they will tell you nothing about your son's progress. Prayers for you!

    Sent using ConductDisorders mobile app
  5. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    Does Grandma know how he spent her gift? I'd tell her. If pot is legal in your state, you can't stop him from using it if some doctor will say he needs it. But you don't have to fund his pot and neither does Grandma.
  6. Signorina

    Signorina Guest

    Take away his access to your cars. So long as he can test positive for thc - he can be issued a DUI. And if he gets into an accident it can have dire consequences for him and for you as the parents.

    My kids' "currency" is usually the car keys- so no car until he tests clean.
  7. Nancy

    Nancy Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Welcome camsmom. I wrote a reply to you yesterday but it was from my mobile app and it never went through.

    I too am shocked that you can get a medical marijuana card for ADHD. I'm also surprised at how easily you can use the card to buy marijuana for your friends. Isn't there a limit on how much you can buy? I am so much against legalizing pot but it looks like those of us who believe that are being outnumbered. I think we have to decriminalizing it so that young people do not go to jail or have records that follow them for the rest of their lives but I have seen so many young people mess up their lives because of pot. My daughter smoked pot and drank fromt he age of 14 and she nearly ruined her life. She was arrested, got kicked out of college, lost every job she had, shoplifted and was nearly homeless before she decided she didn't want to live that way. We kicked her out of the house at 18 and her life was a mess.

    I'm just not sure what to do about this anymore. The treatment centers are overflowing with heroin addicts. When we sent our daughter to rehab for pot/alcohol, she was the only one there for pot. The awful thing is so many young people move on to more dangerous drugs.

    I agree with no access to driving as long as he is using pot. I would not allow drugs brought into your home. I think a counselor is a great idea, I would look for one that specializing in adolescent issues.