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<blockquote data-quote="Malika" data-source="post: 483448" data-attributes="member: 11227"><p>That's a good point, Buddy. The confusion with J is that he is obviously bright (not brilliant, not gifted) and wanting to learn - and, presumably, to "fit in" at school. So during class time he is focused and attentive and poses no behaviour problems. Given the way he is the rest of the time, that is frankly nothing short of a minor miracle that I don't really understand... There are some problems socially at school, I would say - from what I have observed, he is not attentive to when he is too much for other children, he is too brusque, too impulsive, probably acting like a rather younger child most of the time and the little girls in particular find him a nuisance or unwelcome or "too naughty" at times; he has friends and seems liked by them but their relationship is also more conflictual than some others - but at the moment life at school is manageable and he really likes it there and loves going. The school has never called me or complained about his behaviour (thank heaven for small mercies) and the teacher basically wants to dismiss the idea that there is anything "wrong" with him. But he clearly has issues.</p><p>As for the diet thing and additives... could be, could be. But then why was he sitting quietly when I arrived? Certainly he was kind of "beyond" in his language and out of control-ness, more than he usually is when he doesn't get his way... </p><p>To me it's now obvious and undeniable that there is something going on for J beyond the "normal". I've no idea what others see in him, given that there is little popular understanding of things like ADHD or sensory integration or any of that. I suspect most people would put his behaviour down to the fact that I am on my own with him and he doesn't have a full-time father... And, indeed, that remains a moot point. When we got to the farm yesterday, for example, he refused to put his jacket on. I was insisting, he just refused and was running around. The farmer (I presume), who was obviously in charge of the event, just said to him in a very clear, authoritative but not unkind way "I am the boss here and you will put your jacket on!". And J quietly complied...</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Malika, post: 483448, member: 11227"] That's a good point, Buddy. The confusion with J is that he is obviously bright (not brilliant, not gifted) and wanting to learn - and, presumably, to "fit in" at school. So during class time he is focused and attentive and poses no behaviour problems. Given the way he is the rest of the time, that is frankly nothing short of a minor miracle that I don't really understand... There are some problems socially at school, I would say - from what I have observed, he is not attentive to when he is too much for other children, he is too brusque, too impulsive, probably acting like a rather younger child most of the time and the little girls in particular find him a nuisance or unwelcome or "too naughty" at times; he has friends and seems liked by them but their relationship is also more conflictual than some others - but at the moment life at school is manageable and he really likes it there and loves going. The school has never called me or complained about his behaviour (thank heaven for small mercies) and the teacher basically wants to dismiss the idea that there is anything "wrong" with him. But he clearly has issues. As for the diet thing and additives... could be, could be. But then why was he sitting quietly when I arrived? Certainly he was kind of "beyond" in his language and out of control-ness, more than he usually is when he doesn't get his way... To me it's now obvious and undeniable that there is something going on for J beyond the "normal". I've no idea what others see in him, given that there is little popular understanding of things like ADHD or sensory integration or any of that. I suspect most people would put his behaviour down to the fact that I am on my own with him and he doesn't have a full-time father... And, indeed, that remains a moot point. When we got to the farm yesterday, for example, he refused to put his jacket on. I was insisting, he just refused and was running around. The farmer (I presume), who was obviously in charge of the event, just said to him in a very clear, authoritative but not unkind way "I am the boss here and you will put your jacket on!". And J quietly complied... [/QUOTE]
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