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<blockquote data-quote="susiestar" data-source="post: 209098" data-attributes="member: 1233"><p>Hi and Welcome! I think you are very wise to look into this more before you actually get married. </p><p> </p><p>The website for Love and Logic is <a href="http://www.loveandlogic.com" target="_blank">www.loveandlogic.com</a> - and even the info for teachers was helpful to my husband and I. This is a very common-sense approach to things, with an emphasis on natural consequences and nurturing a loving bond between parent and child.</p><p> </p><p>Is Michael this way when he is not with you? Does he live with his mom and spend his weekends with dad? Or is mom even in the picture? Was there any substance abuse or alcohol used during the pregnancy? Those (sub abuse or alcohol can result in a child who CAN'T learn, as opposed to a child who is being defiant or whatever). Do you know what Michael is like in school or daycare? Is he better when he is in his routine, or does it matter?</p><p> </p><p>I strongly feel that your DF needs to do ALL the discipline/time-out/etc... for a LONG time, well up until after teh wedding. It will cause a lot of problems with you developing a relationship with Michael, and in turn, YOU need to do all the discipline etc... for your son.</p><p> </p><p>You need to assess what is going on, and if DF is going to be proactive, get Michael assessed and evaluated, or not. And if that is what you can handle.</p><p> </p><p>I wish you the best,</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="susiestar, post: 209098, member: 1233"] Hi and Welcome! I think you are very wise to look into this more before you actually get married. The website for Love and Logic is [URL="http://www.loveandlogic.com"]www.loveandlogic.com[/URL] - and even the info for teachers was helpful to my husband and I. This is a very common-sense approach to things, with an emphasis on natural consequences and nurturing a loving bond between parent and child. Is Michael this way when he is not with you? Does he live with his mom and spend his weekends with dad? Or is mom even in the picture? Was there any substance abuse or alcohol used during the pregnancy? Those (sub abuse or alcohol can result in a child who CAN'T learn, as opposed to a child who is being defiant or whatever). Do you know what Michael is like in school or daycare? Is he better when he is in his routine, or does it matter? I strongly feel that your DF needs to do ALL the discipline/time-out/etc... for a LONG time, well up until after teh wedding. It will cause a lot of problems with you developing a relationship with Michael, and in turn, YOU need to do all the discipline etc... for your son. You need to assess what is going on, and if DF is going to be proactive, get Michael assessed and evaluated, or not. And if that is what you can handle. I wish you the best, [/QUOTE]
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