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<blockquote data-quote="New Leaf" data-source="post: 760261" data-attributes="member: 19522"><p>Copa, you have been such a support along this journey. I am so sorry that you have suffered so all of these years with the repercussions of your son’s circumstances. </p><p></p><p>This is the hard part, the quest for reunification. I suppose in some psychologists theory, a child will always yearn for their birth parent and these parents do have rights under the law. My Hoku would take her nephew in an instant, if her sister would sign him over. That will not be possible under the current rule. </p><p></p><p>It is a sad fact that I am in the company of many who suffer such torture, because that’s what it is torture.</p><p></p><p>This is all true and I have struggled with this reality and the hard fact that things did not change at all, the more we tried to help. Tornado has to figure out her life choices. I had hoped that maybe this time things would be different. But, the elephant in the room is that she remained on the streets almost up to her due date and entered rehab to avoid jail. I should have read the writing on the wall. </p><p></p><p>It is the hardest part to see an innocent have to suffer the consequences of another’s choices.</p><p></p><p>This is my biggest concern for my older grands, that they have been thrown into this trauma once again. </p><p></p><p>This is true. But I don’t know if she has the capacity to stop herself. It’s pathological to continue to hurt others in this way.</p><p></p><p>I spoke with the social worker today, she called looking for a Tornado. I told her that this is so difficult but I have my reasons for standing my ground. She acknowledged that and said that it is her job to explore all avenues of kinship care. I guess there have been instances where families have changed their minds. I will be okay, Copa. I just have to give this to God and process the hurt. Thank you so much for your wisdom and kindness.</p><p></p><p>Thank you KSM for taking the time to write. I know you have struggles of your own. I pray as well that he finds a nurturing, stable home. I am sure he is traumatized at this point. Hopefully the people caring for him have the capability to help him. </p><p></p><p>I spoke with the social worker about being able to have visits. It is still very early so down the road I think it is possible. </p><p>I hope your daughter can put her child’s interests first and find herself, her strength. </p><p>I still hold that out for Tornado, but her track record is not looking too good right now.</p><p>Sigh.</p><p>Thank you so much.</p><p>I would not wish this journey on anyone, yet here we all are.</p><p>Much love </p><p>Leaf</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="New Leaf, post: 760261, member: 19522"] Copa, you have been such a support along this journey. I am so sorry that you have suffered so all of these years with the repercussions of your son’s circumstances. This is the hard part, the quest for reunification. I suppose in some psychologists theory, a child will always yearn for their birth parent and these parents do have rights under the law. My Hoku would take her nephew in an instant, if her sister would sign him over. That will not be possible under the current rule. It is a sad fact that I am in the company of many who suffer such torture, because that’s what it is torture. This is all true and I have struggled with this reality and the hard fact that things did not change at all, the more we tried to help. Tornado has to figure out her life choices. I had hoped that maybe this time things would be different. But, the elephant in the room is that she remained on the streets almost up to her due date and entered rehab to avoid jail. I should have read the writing on the wall. It is the hardest part to see an innocent have to suffer the consequences of another’s choices. This is my biggest concern for my older grands, that they have been thrown into this trauma once again. This is true. But I don’t know if she has the capacity to stop herself. It’s pathological to continue to hurt others in this way. I spoke with the social worker today, she called looking for a Tornado. I told her that this is so difficult but I have my reasons for standing my ground. She acknowledged that and said that it is her job to explore all avenues of kinship care. I guess there have been instances where families have changed their minds. I will be okay, Copa. I just have to give this to God and process the hurt. Thank you so much for your wisdom and kindness. Thank you KSM for taking the time to write. I know you have struggles of your own. I pray as well that he finds a nurturing, stable home. I am sure he is traumatized at this point. Hopefully the people caring for him have the capability to help him. I spoke with the social worker about being able to have visits. It is still very early so down the road I think it is possible. I hope your daughter can put her child’s interests first and find herself, her strength. I still hold that out for Tornado, but her track record is not looking too good right now. Sigh. Thank you so much. I would not wish this journey on anyone, yet here we all are. Much love Leaf [/QUOTE]
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