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mother in law Again!!!!
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<blockquote data-quote="Shari" data-source="post: 175167" data-attributes="member: 1848"><p>Yup, Stang, we thinkg she sat and took notes.</p><p>***</p><p>My parents live 3 hours from here in a very rural area. They'd met husband's parents at our wedding, obviously, and at birthday party or 2 at my house. They met each other. In no way do they KNOW each other.</p><p>***</p><p>When my dad died, mother in law and father in law drove to my hometown - Parsons. The funeral home and the only hotel in the area are in a town about 20 miles away - Brookfield. Dad died on Tuesday. They showed up at mom's house at 1pm on Thursday. When we all left to go see dad, they went, too. We went back to mom's, instead of staying at their hotel in Brookfield, they drove back to Parsons, too, only to have to then turn around and drive back to Brookfield an hour later. Friday morning, bright and early, here they are at mom's again. Sat in the living room when the minister came to prepare the service, right in the middle of the family. When we went to Brookfield for the visitation (most of us wanted to go early to get our sorts together before people started coming) - there they were. Again, after visitation, they drove back to Parsons to eat with us (at 11pm) then turned around and drove back to Brookfield to their hotel. The funeral, on Saturday, family was asked to be there at 10. Funeral at noon. They were there at 9:30. They stayed for the funeral, dinner after, and left without speaking to anyone.</p><p>***</p><p>The disturbing thing was, she didn't speak to anyone. People in my family eventually went out of their way to talk to her because she'd sit in the corner and just watch. She didn't offer condolances, she didn't help fix, set out food, or clean it up, like other family friends were doing as they passed in and out. I think the one thing she did do was express her amount of suprise that easy child 2 (husband's daughter) spent all day working on a picture and letter to put in dad's casket, and that easy child 2 was truly saddened by this loss. Why wouldn't she be - my dad could be a jerk, but he was a GREAT grandfather to ALL the kids in the family?</p><p>***</p><p>Maybe she didn't know what to say, but still....in 3 days, surely you could come up with SOMETHING. When we all got back home and back to the grind, all of her friends knew all the details. My ex-mother in law was the one who contacted MY friends. And my mom lives in a huge old farmhouse. Dad restored antique furniture as a hobby. mother in law was bound and determined mom was going to sell out and move (which she's not) so EVERY time we mentioned the possibility of going to my mom's, IMMEDIATELY she would say "Setting up for the sale?" or "Let me know when that sale is." Never asked how anyone was doing, particularly mom, just that sale. She is a major pack rat, goes to all kinds of auctions and buys stuff to bring home and shove in her 4car garage, never to be seen again, and, as time passed, I really began to really think she wants mom's stuff. I didn't say anything for a long time, but when I finally did, I wasn't the only one that felt "watched" that week. And we think she sat there all that time and inventoried mom's place.</p><p>***</p><p>She did it with her own mother's house when they put her int he nursing home, why wouldn't she do it to mine...</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Shari, post: 175167, member: 1848"] Yup, Stang, we thinkg she sat and took notes. *** My parents live 3 hours from here in a very rural area. They'd met husband's parents at our wedding, obviously, and at birthday party or 2 at my house. They met each other. In no way do they KNOW each other. *** When my dad died, mother in law and father in law drove to my hometown - Parsons. The funeral home and the only hotel in the area are in a town about 20 miles away - Brookfield. Dad died on Tuesday. They showed up at mom's house at 1pm on Thursday. When we all left to go see dad, they went, too. We went back to mom's, instead of staying at their hotel in Brookfield, they drove back to Parsons, too, only to have to then turn around and drive back to Brookfield an hour later. Friday morning, bright and early, here they are at mom's again. Sat in the living room when the minister came to prepare the service, right in the middle of the family. When we went to Brookfield for the visitation (most of us wanted to go early to get our sorts together before people started coming) - there they were. Again, after visitation, they drove back to Parsons to eat with us (at 11pm) then turned around and drove back to Brookfield to their hotel. The funeral, on Saturday, family was asked to be there at 10. Funeral at noon. They were there at 9:30. They stayed for the funeral, dinner after, and left without speaking to anyone. *** The disturbing thing was, she didn't speak to anyone. People in my family eventually went out of their way to talk to her because she'd sit in the corner and just watch. She didn't offer condolances, she didn't help fix, set out food, or clean it up, like other family friends were doing as they passed in and out. I think the one thing she did do was express her amount of suprise that easy child 2 (husband's daughter) spent all day working on a picture and letter to put in dad's casket, and that easy child 2 was truly saddened by this loss. Why wouldn't she be - my dad could be a jerk, but he was a GREAT grandfather to ALL the kids in the family? *** Maybe she didn't know what to say, but still....in 3 days, surely you could come up with SOMETHING. When we all got back home and back to the grind, all of her friends knew all the details. My ex-mother in law was the one who contacted MY friends. And my mom lives in a huge old farmhouse. Dad restored antique furniture as a hobby. mother in law was bound and determined mom was going to sell out and move (which she's not) so EVERY time we mentioned the possibility of going to my mom's, IMMEDIATELY she would say "Setting up for the sale?" or "Let me know when that sale is." Never asked how anyone was doing, particularly mom, just that sale. She is a major pack rat, goes to all kinds of auctions and buys stuff to bring home and shove in her 4car garage, never to be seen again, and, as time passed, I really began to really think she wants mom's stuff. I didn't say anything for a long time, but when I finally did, I wasn't the only one that felt "watched" that week. And we think she sat there all that time and inventoried mom's place. *** She did it with her own mother's house when they put her int he nursing home, why wouldn't she do it to mine... [/QUOTE]
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