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Substance Abuse
My 29 year old son is homeless and addicted, and 700 miles from me...
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<blockquote data-quote="Carol B." data-source="post: 674722" data-attributes="member: 17964"><p>Hello Pam 54,</p><p></p><p>I totally understand where you are at. My son, 31, got messed up with "stuff" and chose to run from life...meaning living on the streets he could be his own boss. He has been doing it for four years at this point. It is difficult to continue with out feeling guilt. Remember guilt is defined as: a responsibility for a crime or for doing something bad or wrong, a bad feeling caused by knowing or thinking that you have done something bad or wrong. As parents we want the best for our kids, and it is painful to know and watch them choose unhealthy paths. If you are like me, you raised him with good morals and values. At some point they get so lost in finding their identity even with our guidance they struggle. </p><p></p><p>Like your son, mine will call to "check in" and let me know he is ok (aka alive), at this point he is in the area we live, but only see him when he needs a night away from the streets or his current girlfriend. We have set up help for him multiple times only to have him leave because it was too difficult (he didn't want to put in the work and didn't want to change). Just recently mine lovely child called and wanted help again, when he was told no, and given resources to contact that could help...communication was severed, again. As in prior times, he is getting ready to run to a new city, where no one knows him and the ability to get help from the state is fresh.</p><p></p><p>Unfortunately we as loving parents pay the price of heartache. Finding this forum has been great for me, I also have friends that unbeknownst to me have gone through similar situations--having them to talk to and be there and truly understand has been priceless. Another thing I found that helps is that I keep a journal of all the amazing stories and situations and started writing a book about ways to achieve your goals, entertwined.</p><p>with snippets from my son's situation. It is very cathartic for me. </p><p>Sometimes just journaling the situation and how it makes you feel helps. </p><p></p><p>Question, when you find him then what? I know here, the only way to get him evaluated is if they are a threat to themselves or others...he is an adult and they will not admit him unless it is on his own, which then he has a right to leave at any time. Even when they are a threat to themselves or others it is only a 72 hour hold. Check with Human Services in the state you are in on that. Finding the shelters is at least an option for him to have a place to be at night. </p><p></p><p>I pray that you do what is right for you. If you want to talk privately let me know....I am right there with you. </p><p></p><p>Carol</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Carol B., post: 674722, member: 17964"] Hello Pam 54, I totally understand where you are at. My son, 31, got messed up with "stuff" and chose to run from life...meaning living on the streets he could be his own boss. He has been doing it for four years at this point. It is difficult to continue with out feeling guilt. Remember guilt is defined as: a responsibility for a crime or for doing something bad or wrong, a bad feeling caused by knowing or thinking that you have done something bad or wrong. As parents we want the best for our kids, and it is painful to know and watch them choose unhealthy paths. If you are like me, you raised him with good morals and values. At some point they get so lost in finding their identity even with our guidance they struggle. Like your son, mine will call to "check in" and let me know he is ok (aka alive), at this point he is in the area we live, but only see him when he needs a night away from the streets or his current girlfriend. We have set up help for him multiple times only to have him leave because it was too difficult (he didn't want to put in the work and didn't want to change). Just recently mine lovely child called and wanted help again, when he was told no, and given resources to contact that could help...communication was severed, again. As in prior times, he is getting ready to run to a new city, where no one knows him and the ability to get help from the state is fresh. Unfortunately we as loving parents pay the price of heartache. Finding this forum has been great for me, I also have friends that unbeknownst to me have gone through similar situations--having them to talk to and be there and truly understand has been priceless. Another thing I found that helps is that I keep a journal of all the amazing stories and situations and started writing a book about ways to achieve your goals, entertwined. with snippets from my son's situation. It is very cathartic for me. Sometimes just journaling the situation and how it makes you feel helps. Question, when you find him then what? I know here, the only way to get him evaluated is if they are a threat to themselves or others...he is an adult and they will not admit him unless it is on his own, which then he has a right to leave at any time. Even when they are a threat to themselves or others it is only a 72 hour hold. Check with Human Services in the state you are in on that. Finding the shelters is at least an option for him to have a place to be at night. I pray that you do what is right for you. If you want to talk privately let me know....I am right there with you. Carol [/QUOTE]
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My 29 year old son is homeless and addicted, and 700 miles from me...
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