My Daughter, the Tenant

Discussion in 'Parent Emeritus' started by meowbunny, Jan 10, 2008.

  1. meowbunny

    meowbunny New Member

    This was not her decision, this was mine. I got tired of resenting her not doing things or doing them on her schedule rather than when I felt they should be done (sorry, but I really want a room vacced before 5:00 pm, not after 10 pm).

    The last time we talked, she refused a contract but did write up a schedule when she would do her chores for each day. Mind you, no chore other than her room and washing clothes takes more than 15 minutes. To date, she followed this schedule for a grand total of 3 days in a one-month period.

    I tried to talk to her about it, she got defensive. UGH. I mentioned a contract, she stated flat out she would not sign it. I got tired of the arguing, resentment, etc., so, this is my decision:

    My daughter is a tenant in this house. Her monthly rent payment takes care of her having a room, the utilities, computer use. Doing of her chores entitles her to the food in the home. She will be responsible for her own food if she does not do her daily chores. She will be entirely responsible for her own hygiene items.

    Her response was that you don't tell a tenant that you love them. I simply said I do. When she heard the hygiene issue, she said I obviously didn't have a daughter. I didn't say a word.

    This phase of the saga should be interesting. As the saying goes, wish me luck .... I'm going in!
     
  2. Big Bad Kitty

    Big Bad Kitty lolcat

    Arming you with a double dose of juju.
     
  3. WhymeMom?

    WhymeMom? No real answers to life..

    Batten down the hatches(meaning lock up your hygiene items, she may go a'wanderin') it's gonna be a bumpy ride, but good for you for making the decision and hope she finally "gets" it.....
     
  4. meowbunny

    meowbunny New Member

    She can't use my stuff -- she's allergic to what I use. Changed to these products many years ago when I got tired of running out of my stuff because she wouldn't make the effort to tell me she needed something.

    I'm such a mean mom! (Said as I pat myself on the back.)
     
  5. flutterbee

    flutterbee Guest

    Yay! Another member of the Meanie Club! :dance:
     
  6. hearts and roses

    hearts and roses Mind Reader

    :warrior: Sending some extra armor & good juju!!
     
  7. Suz

    Suz (the future) MRS. GERE

    OK, she's allergic to your personal hygiene stuff (good thinking!)............do you have locks on our cabinets and refrigerator for the food? How are you going to police that if she doesn't do her chores?

    I feel for you. I remember when I would get so exasperated that I'd go on strike. The first time it brought a quick turnaround...but not after that.

    I hated trying to think of natural consequences that I could enforce without killing me.

    Good luck!

    Suz
     
  8. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    Keep us updated on how this works, I might have to take that stand too.

    Although at the moment Nichole is pretty well sticking to her bargain. But that could stop at any time.

    Sending some powerful vibes your way. :hypnosis:

    Hugs
     
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