My difficult child graduated from college

Discussion in 'Parent Emeritus' started by Irene_J, May 8, 2014.

  1. Irene_J

    Irene_J New Member

    Hello Friends
    I don't post much anymore, but I do read posts often. My difficult child graduated from college on Saturday and we just returned home. Only this board would understand how I feel. Of course, there is pride and happiness, but also a time for deep reflection.

    Just like you, I have been through the wringer with my difficult child: unbelievable defiance, running away, cutting, early sexual activity, alcohol and marijuana use, stealing, school suspensions, arrests and one conviction. Not to mention the amount of money spent on reparations, therapy, changing schools, etc. I tried everything. Nothing worked. Things didn't get fixed until I stopped trying to fix them.

    People who knew my difficult child before want to compliment me on her change. I always say it was my difficult child, not me, that did it. It was only when I let go, that things improved.

    My difficult child is now 25. She had an interview set up on the next day after returning home. She joins the other college grads trying to find a job, but both of us are optimistic about her future.

    I have been on this board for years, and came here after one of the lowest points in my history with my daughter. But we are now in a better place. This may sound strange, but even if my difficult child had not turned things around, I would stll be in a better place, because I know that I had done the best I could, and had to let go to let her find her own path. I came to accept that her path may not be the one that I wanted for her. That is what this board helped me to accept. I hope I can pass a little hope on to other board members.
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  2. Thank you for sharing her success. I sometimes don't see a light at the end of the tunnel but posts like this give me hope.

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  3. dstc_99

    dstc_99 Well-Known Member

    Congratulations! Give yourself some credit though. Even though you had to let go for difficult child to improve I am sure all the examples you set for her allowed her to figure out what needed changing.
  4. Scent of Cedar *

    Scent of Cedar * Well-Known Member

    This is wonderful news. It was great to hear that you would have been able to maintain your balance however this had turned out.

    Congratulations to your daughter!


  5. recoveringenabler

    recoveringenabler Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Thanks so much for the update. Congratulations to both you and your daughter. Your story is an inspiration to those still struggling.
  6. tryagain

    tryagain Active Member

    So glad to hear this. Congratulations to you all.
  7. Childofmine

    Childofmine trying to do this thing one day at a time Staff Member

    Thank you for posting. I hope for all good things and a continued peaceful path for you and your difficult child.
  8. pasajes4

    pasajes4 Well-Known Member

    Fantastic! So happy for the both of you.