I dont' even know where to begin anymore. There is no word on who killed my son. I miss him so much, I can't stand it. I cry all the time. I did meet with a grief counselor today and all I did was cry. The only thing keeps me going is trying to get the reward money up. Then I finally called my oldest difficult child's lawyer, just briefly he was arrested for agg. assault (larger things dropped) because he missed his last hearing due to my son's funeral. Well they offered a plea of 2-4 years! Great now I'm going to lose antoher son, he told me if he had to go to prison he would kill himself. I'm at my wits end, I can't go on like this anymore. I'm back at work but all I does is think about these tragedies in my life. It feels so unfair everything that is happening. I don't feel like i can go thru anymore trauma. I'm not telling him, I will wait until next week, atty. can tell him. This is a conference. I guess they want to see if he'll accept it, but atty said to wait it out, he is going to ask it not to leave the table just yet, especially with everything that has hapoened. I'm in such despair. I've lost so much weight, I can't eat it makes me sick to my stomach. I can't sleep, I think about my 15 y/o baby who died to young and so senseless. I wonder who could do this, it is eating me up inside. I try and talk and let this out of me because I'm so filled with dread. I feel hopeless.