My mom does this every so often. She will talk to my ex about my kids and ask for him to be more helpful. I don't know why she does this. It usually never works, and what's worse is he then takes things out on me because of it. My mom informed me yesterday that she was going to have a talk with him last night. When I asked her what it was about, she told me she wanted to talk to him about him being more respectful towards me and to stop blaming me for every thing the kids do wrong. I asked her to please not do this. Any time she has a talk with him he ends up taking it out on ME. My mom swore up and down she would be tactful and would try her best not to insult him. I know she means well, but her little talks never make an impact on him good or bad. Last time she had a talk with him was when difficult child 1 texted me and her when she was spending the night at his house. Him and his wife were making fun of difficult child and saying things like she was lazy, messy, and did not know how to take care of herself. Stepmom also called difficult child fat. They said all of this within ear shot of difficult child 1 and she became very upset, insisting that her father and stepmother hated her. My mom had a little talk to ex about it and told him how hurt difficult child was. It did not do any good. Ex just listened to my mom and didn't say a word. After that, the verbal abuse continued. My mom was so sure that her little talk would have such a huge impact on him that he would do a big turnaround and change for the better. She couldn't be more wrong. Now she has it in her head to have a talk with him about disrespecting me in front of the kids. She overheard the story of stepmom having a huge fit and insulting me because I help difficult child 2 get his shoes on in the morning. She yelled and carried on about it for quite some time, saying how horrible it was and that I was making my son lazy. I was not happy when I heard about it either. I am choosing to keep my mouth shut because I do not want to add fuel to the fire. My kids' dad just got through threatening CPS on me because of a missing package of socks about a week and a half ago, and I do not wish to make things worse. Talking never helps. But my mom is insisting on it. I wouldn't put it past that evil witch to start taking it out on my kids when she hears of this little talk between ex and my mom. She is vindictive and spiteful and it's something she would definitely do. My mom made an "appointment" to talk to him last night, but he got too busy at work and had to stay overtime. He rescheduled for tomorrow night. I am trying to change her mind but she's not budging. Nothing good can come of this, I'm sure. I just know he's gonna think I put her up to it and he's gonna take things out on me even worse after the talk. I wish she would just learn to stay out of it and let me handle it. I know she's trying to be helpful but I have a feeling she is just going to make things worse and right now I need the least amount of anxiety as I can get. Ugh!