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Parent Emeritus
My son is in jail. Again. To visit or not to visit, that is the question...
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 624958" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>You have to do what you feel like it. I have no idea what I'd do...especially the fourth or fifth time. I don't think I'd give him money or anything like that. I don't know that I'd rush. What did he do?</p><p></p><p>He is sadly becoming a regular in jail and I hope that, if it's drug, he gets help this time and decides to change his life. I do not think that your showing up or not showing up will make any difference in how his life's travels will evolve. This is one walk he has to take himself and alone, as he nears his thirtieth birthday. As long as you continue to realize that you didn't cause him to do illegal things, and that you can't change him...and if you can detach and not be overly emotional when you see him...I think you should do what you want to do. If you think you will fall apart or have to listen to him blame you (verbal abuse), demand mo<strong>ney from you, etc...I'd give it a while. in my opinion, I would not do ANYTHING that will harm</strong> your mental or physical health. That doesn't help anyone.YOU MATTER AS MUCH AS YOUR SON DOES></p><p></p><p>Of course, these are only my own thoughts and, to be honest, none of my kids never did end up in jail, although one was one parole twice.</p><p></p><p>Sending hugs and empathy for your hurting mommy heart.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 624958, member: 1550"] You have to do what you feel like it. I have no idea what I'd do...especially the fourth or fifth time. I don't think I'd give him money or anything like that. I don't know that I'd rush. What did he do? He is sadly becoming a regular in jail and I hope that, if it's drug, he gets help this time and decides to change his life. I do not think that your showing up or not showing up will make any difference in how his life's travels will evolve. This is one walk he has to take himself and alone, as he nears his thirtieth birthday. As long as you continue to realize that you didn't cause him to do illegal things, and that you can't change him...and if you can detach and not be overly emotional when you see him...I think you should do what you want to do. If you think you will fall apart or have to listen to him blame you (verbal abuse), demand mo[B]ney from you, etc...I'd give it a while. in my opinion, I would not do ANYTHING that will harm[/B] your mental or physical health. That doesn't help anyone.YOU MATTER AS MUCH AS YOUR SON DOES> Of course, these are only my own thoughts and, to be honest, none of my kids never did end up in jail, although one was one parole twice. Sending hugs and empathy for your hurting mommy heart. [/QUOTE]
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My son is in jail. Again. To visit or not to visit, that is the question...
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