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My step son hates me and his brothers
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<blockquote data-quote="hehatesus" data-source="post: 609638" data-attributes="member: 17059"><p>Hello, I am new to this site. I've literally exhausted the internet trying to find help and support from others. My family is awesome! We just have one small issue. My step son B hates all of us except his dad. About a year and half ago we won full custody of mg husbands boys because the oldest wanted to live with us. B made it very clear HE DID NOT!! because of his age and courts not wanting to separate the kids he came too. B never has adjusted to living with us. His grades improved dramatically but we also got him help. He has ADHD and is now awaiting a psychological evaluation to determine conduct disorder. Our lives have been short of living in hell. I love B with all my heart and soul but he rejects me and his brothers all the time. He is abusive to his brothers and manipulates me. We have 4 boys and we show them equal attention. But lately B has made it to where he gets it all or no one is getting any attention. I used to take 1 boy a weekend and do a special few hours with them. They all loved this. But it had to stop because of B. B went back to his mom and said I bruised him from hitting him. The only reason she didn't believe it was because his dad had caught him doing the bruises to himself that were later blamed on me. He has even come up to me and said work out an agreement with dad so my mom and dad can get back together and he can still see the other boys. He's told me I'm horrible. But then when he wants attention he comes to me. I have done what I can to eliminate myself from his antics so he gets mad that he has little to go on to cause problems. He also is a bully. He bullies all of his brothers older and younger. His favorite to pick one is O who he never liked to begin with. B is 10 and O is 3. O can be playing with his toys saying nothing to anyone and B will go over and just start beating on him. B has even tried to choke O and has hit O with several objects of force. It has come to the point B can no longer live here with us and we are making an agreement with his mom for him to go be with her again. Were hoping since this is what he wants and seems to be more at ease there that his therapy and living there will help him learn to handle his disorders. At his moms its not ideal but he will be the only child and hopefully that will ease his need for constant attention because she can give it. Were just at a loss as how to help him. He doesn't want us to be a part of his life. In fact he'd rather we just disappeared and never saw us again. But were not going anywhere. Were just not allowing his issues to become his brothers issues cause he using them for a punching bag for anything. If this does not work we will be back to the drawing board. But any parents out there been dealing with this long enough to have results ? We need realistic views of expected outcomes.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="hehatesus, post: 609638, member: 17059"] Hello, I am new to this site. I've literally exhausted the internet trying to find help and support from others. My family is awesome! We just have one small issue. My step son B hates all of us except his dad. About a year and half ago we won full custody of mg husbands boys because the oldest wanted to live with us. B made it very clear HE DID NOT!! because of his age and courts not wanting to separate the kids he came too. B never has adjusted to living with us. His grades improved dramatically but we also got him help. He has ADHD and is now awaiting a psychological evaluation to determine conduct disorder. Our lives have been short of living in hell. I love B with all my heart and soul but he rejects me and his brothers all the time. He is abusive to his brothers and manipulates me. We have 4 boys and we show them equal attention. But lately B has made it to where he gets it all or no one is getting any attention. I used to take 1 boy a weekend and do a special few hours with them. They all loved this. But it had to stop because of B. B went back to his mom and said I bruised him from hitting him. The only reason she didn't believe it was because his dad had caught him doing the bruises to himself that were later blamed on me. He has even come up to me and said work out an agreement with dad so my mom and dad can get back together and he can still see the other boys. He's told me I'm horrible. But then when he wants attention he comes to me. I have done what I can to eliminate myself from his antics so he gets mad that he has little to go on to cause problems. He also is a bully. He bullies all of his brothers older and younger. His favorite to pick one is O who he never liked to begin with. B is 10 and O is 3. O can be playing with his toys saying nothing to anyone and B will go over and just start beating on him. B has even tried to choke O and has hit O with several objects of force. It has come to the point B can no longer live here with us and we are making an agreement with his mom for him to go be with her again. Were hoping since this is what he wants and seems to be more at ease there that his therapy and living there will help him learn to handle his disorders. At his moms its not ideal but he will be the only child and hopefully that will ease his need for constant attention because she can give it. Were just at a loss as how to help him. He doesn't want us to be a part of his life. In fact he'd rather we just disappeared and never saw us again. But were not going anywhere. Were just not allowing his issues to become his brothers issues cause he using them for a punching bag for anything. If this does not work we will be back to the drawing board. But any parents out there been dealing with this long enough to have results ? We need realistic views of expected outcomes. [/QUOTE]
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