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Substance Abuse
Nancy, how are you doing today?
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<blockquote data-quote="toughlovin" data-source="post: 519034"><p>Nancy,</p><p></p><p>I have thought about you and what you are going through so much....it is so close to home really as I may be where you are in a few weeks. Time will tell. I have had those thoughts about death bringing closure... my fear however is that it won't really. And jail is awful too... but at least there hopefully they are not using. I think one of my biggest fear is that he will keep using, keeping getting into worse drugs and I will still be in this same place 20 years from now!! It is knowing that he could still be in the same place in 20 years that makes me realize I need to keep moving on so that no matter where he is in 20 years, I am in a good place. Ya know retired, living on a beach, traveling the world, and enjyoing my life!!!</p><p></p><p>I so wish both of you lived near me so I could take you to the parents alanon group we go to!! It is filled with parents with kids in all stages of addiction. Some have kids in recovery, some have kids in the throes of addiction, some have kids who were in recovery who have relapsed. You get the picture... and all ages too. So some with kids who are teens or young adults, and some with older kids who are in their 30s or 40s. The focus is really on how to take of ourselves, what we can do to heal.... and it sounds like that is what you want right now. At some point it is time to stop focusing on the addict and their problems and find ways to move on in spite of what they are doing.</p><p></p><p>I do like the kite analogy.... and yeah let that string out as far as it can go right now, let that kite fly out of sight, get caught in trees or crash to the ground, but the string is so far out you don't have to know it. Maybe you feel a tug here and there but you don't go looking for that kite.</p><p></p><p>TL</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="toughlovin, post: 519034"] Nancy, I have thought about you and what you are going through so much....it is so close to home really as I may be where you are in a few weeks. Time will tell. I have had those thoughts about death bringing closure... my fear however is that it won't really. And jail is awful too... but at least there hopefully they are not using. I think one of my biggest fear is that he will keep using, keeping getting into worse drugs and I will still be in this same place 20 years from now!! It is knowing that he could still be in the same place in 20 years that makes me realize I need to keep moving on so that no matter where he is in 20 years, I am in a good place. Ya know retired, living on a beach, traveling the world, and enjyoing my life!!! I so wish both of you lived near me so I could take you to the parents alanon group we go to!! It is filled with parents with kids in all stages of addiction. Some have kids in recovery, some have kids in the throes of addiction, some have kids who were in recovery who have relapsed. You get the picture... and all ages too. So some with kids who are teens or young adults, and some with older kids who are in their 30s or 40s. The focus is really on how to take of ourselves, what we can do to heal.... and it sounds like that is what you want right now. At some point it is time to stop focusing on the addict and their problems and find ways to move on in spite of what they are doing. I do like the kite analogy.... and yeah let that string out as far as it can go right now, let that kite fly out of sight, get caught in trees or crash to the ground, but the string is so far out you don't have to know it. Maybe you feel a tug here and there but you don't go looking for that kite. TL [/QUOTE]
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Nancy, how are you doing today?
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