Natural Consequences

Discussion in 'Parent Emeritus' started by Hound dog, Nov 15, 2010.

  1. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    I had katie order a cell phone via Community Action. The phone is free and loaded with 250 mins each month. It's a govt program to help keep very low income people with phone access. Great for the elderly, but you don't have to be elderly to qualify. The phone arrived on sat along with her medicaid card for herself, M, and Evan.

    husband wanted to run the phone and medical card up to her. A 3 hr round trip. I nipped that in the bud with a great big NO. I'm not making a 3 hr trip to dayton to hand her a cell phone and the medical card when gas is at 3 bucks a gallon here. Cell phone isn't a necessity, although it would be nice for her to have it. And the medical card isn't either...........because now that she's in a new county she has to transfer the welfare anyway and they'll issue a new card (s). She was told to do that friday. If she did as she was told she should have the new card by tues.

    Otherwise.......not taking the phone to her unless I have a reason to head in that direction, which at the moment I don't. husband didn't like it. But I told him if she sees even once we head up there for something that isn't important, we'll be called at least once a day for something frivolous that she wants us to bring her. Not happening. husband came around once I pointed that out to him.

    Travis has psychiatric class with someone who volunteers on a reg basis out at the shelter. There has been a family spot open for about a week. Which if Katie had not lied about calling, she would be there instead of dayton. So now she has to start all over, start the kids in a new school, hunt down docs (like that's gonna happen) ect. Gotta love those natural consequences.

    School nurse here arranged for Lion's Club to pay for Kayla glasses / eye exam. Lion's Club director called me and I had to tell her the kids moved to the dayton shelter. She was still willing to pay for kayla's glasses. I told her honestly it wasn't necessary as katie has a medicaid card for kayla and she should have taken care of the eye exam / glasses weeks ago. More than likely that info is going to get back to the school nurse.........who may report it to cps. I know it was reported to cps in Mo twice already. Katie has been "getting" glasses for kayla for 2 yrs now and still hasn't gotten them.:mad: I thanked the woman and told her she might want to use the funds for someone who doesn't have the medicaid card.

    No I don't expect that Katie will get kayla's glasses anymore than she's made an effort to do so the past 2 yrs. But if she doesn't that is more fuel for cps. Medical neglect.

    Katie also got turned in for Evan's rotting teeth. She had some pulled back in Mo to make cps happy. But he has at least the rest of the top ones that have to go.......they are really bad, it's a big part of his eating issues. She came along to Nichole's dentist appointment. I told her the doctor was great with kids and he takes medicaid to make an appoint. (we have few that take medicaid) She said she'd do it later. Well not he's too far away. ugh More grounds for medical neglect.

    Alex doesn't talk, he shouts. I suspect hearing issues. He's never had his hearing checked. I told her to have it checked several times over the past 2 yrs. He's had tons of ear infections, severe ones........and she never had the tubes put in like the pediatrician doctor wanted. I vaguely recall her stating that the school wanted her to have his hearing checked and she argued with them because she believes his shouting is because he thinks if he shouts people can understand his speech. Bull, Travis had as bad speech issues and Evans is worse.........neither of them shout. But when Darrin's ears are blocked by infection he can't hear......and guess what? The boy shouts. ughhh by the way he'll be getting his tonsils out soon which is the cause of all his ear infections. If Alex is having hearing issues, it could be playing a big part in his learning difficulties.

    You know it's really not that difficult to take your kids to a doctor or dentist, and it's certainly not that she has to pay for any of it. Just too lazy, or afraid the docs will see something and report it. The latter was the case the last time she was here.

    So far we haven't heard from her. I guess she hasn't found the library yet. lol :tongue: I'm curious as to how things are going there........I imagine it's not at all pleasant. I'm sure when we do hear from her we'll hear all about how life is positively horrid there. lol
  2. witzend

    witzend Well-Known Member

    I would put it in a padded package & ship it to her. A USPS flat rate box is $4.95. Stay strong, Lisa.
    Last edited: Nov 15, 2010
  3. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    I was considering that........................then Nichole invited husband and I to dinner friday. She'd planned on tomorrow but her new job started so she had to change plans. So since we'll be heading up there, we'll go a head and take the things to her. I just don't want to start unnecessary trips because she was already trying to take advantage of that here. She got a copy of her GED in the mail today too, so I'll take that to her as well.

    Which reminds me to leave a message for her on facebook that we'll be that they'll be at the shelter to receive the items. I want to make sure she gets them. If she doesn't get back to me via facebook I'll have to call the shelter to tell her.
  4. KTMom91

    KTMom91 Well-Known Member

    Hugs, Lisa.
  5. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Good idea. Hey, if you havent applied for the phone in your name or Travis' name, do so. If you want me to get mine and ship it to you, I can do that too. I have no use for the one I am eligible for and wouldnt have a problem in the world with sending it to you.
  6. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    Hugs Lisa. With all of the things she hasn't taken care of for the kids, why haven't you called CPS? You clearly are aware that she is NOT caring for the kids and you strongly suspect that she has a substantial drug problem. It is likely that if the kids ever get medicine for medical problems that the parents will at least "try" them. Esp if they are to help with the pain from the ear problems or the rotting teeth (which have to be incredibly painful - how bad did YOUR teeth hurt? Are Evan's teeth worse than yours were? How much of his gfgness is related to not getting the right nutrition because he cannot eat with those teeth or related to being in constant pain from his teeth?)

    Would it be wise to call CPS yourself? Wouldn't it be a service to the children? You can tell them these things, the teeth and Kayla's eye problems, along with the drug suspicions, without giving your name. They may push for your name but you can just say that you are not willing to give it. I know how hard it is. I truly do. I have made that call. It was incredibly difficult and tore me up, still upsets me sometimes. My niece was in a bad situation but it was NOTHING like what your grandkids are dealing with.

    I am sure you have good reasons not to call. I just thought maybe if you looked at the whole issue you might change your mind about calling.