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Substance Abuse
Need a Little Advice from Those Who Have been there done that
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<blockquote data-quote="Calamity Jane" data-source="post: 608103" data-attributes="member: 13882"><p>Hi Petunia,</p><p>Mortification and unwanted notoriety is often a side effect of parenting a difficult child. My own difficult child is well known to the police in my small town, and difficult child has (had) a terrible reputation around here, which, rightly or wrongly, reflected on us as a family. It's the ripple effect of living with my son, anyway.</p><p>I am by nature, a very conservative, law abiding, quiet person who has respect for people and property, as well as my country. When my son was in the throes of his drug use, he would rail publicly against our country, against me and his father, against society, against law enforcement, to any boob who would listen. He broke into an abandoned house in town, he was caught with drugs and alcohol, he was in constant trouble at school. I have other relatives who live in this town, and in the town next to us, and their kids are all PCs, very smart and accomplished. I would want to just dig a hole and jump in it when difficult child would "do his thing." Maybe I shouldn't have taken it personally, but jeez, I'm his mother, and it does reflect badly on me, so while my in-laws would rightfully bask in the afterglow of their kids being A students, or getting scholarships or volunteerism awards, I'd just want to disappear. Petunia, people must have had mercy on me, because one look at my prematurely aged, careworn face, and I think they understood I was going through my own private he** and they backed off. I didn't feel their condemnation as much as my own condemnation for myself. One of my sisters in law is the nosiest, most cluelessly intrusive individual I've ever met, and she never takes a hint, and always attempts to pry into our business - not because she cares, but because she wants to make sure her kids are doing so much better than mine. I usually avoid her calls. As far as my daughter was concerned, she just let it roll off her back. She would agree that her brother was an idiot and she offered no defense!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Calamity Jane, post: 608103, member: 13882"] Hi Petunia, Mortification and unwanted notoriety is often a side effect of parenting a difficult child. My own difficult child is well known to the police in my small town, and difficult child has (had) a terrible reputation around here, which, rightly or wrongly, reflected on us as a family. It's the ripple effect of living with my son, anyway. I am by nature, a very conservative, law abiding, quiet person who has respect for people and property, as well as my country. When my son was in the throes of his drug use, he would rail publicly against our country, against me and his father, against society, against law enforcement, to any boob who would listen. He broke into an abandoned house in town, he was caught with drugs and alcohol, he was in constant trouble at school. I have other relatives who live in this town, and in the town next to us, and their kids are all PCs, very smart and accomplished. I would want to just dig a hole and jump in it when difficult child would "do his thing." Maybe I shouldn't have taken it personally, but jeez, I'm his mother, and it does reflect badly on me, so while my in-laws would rightfully bask in the afterglow of their kids being A students, or getting scholarships or volunteerism awards, I'd just want to disappear. Petunia, people must have had mercy on me, because one look at my prematurely aged, careworn face, and I think they understood I was going through my own private he** and they backed off. I didn't feel their condemnation as much as my own condemnation for myself. One of my sisters in law is the nosiest, most cluelessly intrusive individual I've ever met, and she never takes a hint, and always attempts to pry into our business - not because she cares, but because she wants to make sure her kids are doing so much better than mine. I usually avoid her calls. As far as my daughter was concerned, she just let it roll off her back. She would agree that her brother was an idiot and she offered no defense! [/QUOTE]
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