Hi, I thought I had a normal, even smart, adopted 4 yr old daughter - although I had been warned that she could be very naughty, disruptive. So I was always firm and consistent with her from the beginning, and always followed through on consequences, so there was no ambiguity. Things were great. She was happy, did puzzles, her memory for places, people, events was amazing......astonishing. She could be saucy and sarcastic in her newly learned english language (sign of intelligence). Then she started school. Thats when things started to go wrong. Or problems started to appear. She's always been highly manipulative (especially with anyone new, and more so if they are pretty with a sympathetic attitude), and my feeling is that slowly but surely she started to manipulate the teachers at school in this way: she would pretend not to understand them, or do what they wanted her to do (get more attention?). At first this happened just at school, but then she brought this behaviour home with her. She will 'pretend' not to know what she is doing. For example, she will act like she does not know where her shoes are (even though they are always kept in the same place). But after 2 time outs.......she will be able to go to her shoes and put them on. She will then repeat the same behaviour with her jacket, the bathroom, her schoolbag......whatever it is that you want her to do or comply with, she will stare blankly at you and in my opinion 'pretend' not to know what you mean. Of course, this infuriates me, because I think it is deliberate, and it is continual. I began to really worry that she had some serious mental issues, but consistently, if I stick it out long enough, she will find what she can't find, do what she can't do, or remember what she can't remember. 5 times today alone, I have taken a stand with her, and every time, if I'm persistent and stick it out, she will eventually comply. So I know that it is not a mental disorder, but a behavioural disorder. The school does not have a free 1/2 hr to wait until she will comply, and so they 'help' her to find her shoes, bag, jacket, desk, they tell me that she has ADHD and Learning Disability (LD). I really believe that this is ODD. She has also shown previous behaviour such as pretending to cry or tantrum in the street, then she will BURST out laughing into my face....then she is more angry at herself for 'giving the game away' then she will scream harder and louder. If she knows that she is making you angry, then at first she would start laughing....but now she just stares blankly and waits for a reaction, time-out, whatever. She always has to push it to the limit. She also does things like taking a ****, then putting it in the cupboard. She will now claim that she cannot do the simplest baby puzzle...whereas before, she could do a 60 piece puzzle, no problem. But put an incentive in front of her, and she can do it. I myself would believe that she had serious mental issues, if it wasn't for the fact that if I say 'Oh well, if you can't find your boots....then you can't go out and play in the snow!' She will then either find her boots, or rage, or both! My psychiatrist shakes his head.....says that she could be the poster child for ODD.....but we are also exploring ADHD....and Learning Disability (LD), but how can a child who presented for a year as being SO BRIGHT and INDEPENDANT suddenly turn into a child who cannot (or will not) dress themselves? Can anyone else identify with this type of passive opposition? Or am I going completely crazy? How do you handle it?