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<blockquote data-quote="Nomad" data-source="post: 191288"><p>Congratulations on being so close to finishing with school! Also, on the arrival of the grandbabies.</p><p> </p><p>It is a bit concerning to me that your daughter had two children so close to one another when she must have had an inclination that she had issues with depression and needed your support in certain kinds of ways. To me, this is an indication of something.</p><p> </p><p>Of course, it is what it is and since you are a loving mom and grandmother, you will have a desire to help. At the same time, the sooner she learns to stop over-relying on others...the better off she will be.</p><p> </p><p>I do like the idea of getting folks to meet you half way. You might offer lots of suggestions, make phone calls, pitch in for emergencies, make compromises here and there, ask Dad to do more, see who else might be able to do more. Remind her that if she is depressed, medications might be of help. Offer to get her to the doctor, pay for a prescription or two. In other words....offer a little managerial advice and a little hands on help for the time being. This is what families do and when we have someone hurting in our family, it seems logical that sometimes we might do a little extra.</p><p> </p><p><strong>However,</strong> I would NOT put your life on hold for your adult child. This is <strong>extreme</strong> and it does not serve you well, nor does it teach your adult child any wisdom.</p><p> </p><p>My guess is that you have been putting your life on hold for too long. I agree... put one foot in front of the other and plow ahead with your plans. Good luck and good wishes.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Nomad, post: 191288"] Congratulations on being so close to finishing with school! Also, on the arrival of the grandbabies. It is a bit concerning to me that your daughter had two children so close to one another when she must have had an inclination that she had issues with depression and needed your support in certain kinds of ways. To me, this is an indication of something. Of course, it is what it is and since you are a loving mom and grandmother, you will have a desire to help. At the same time, the sooner she learns to stop over-relying on others...the better off she will be. I do like the idea of getting folks to meet you half way. You might offer lots of suggestions, make phone calls, pitch in for emergencies, make compromises here and there, ask Dad to do more, see who else might be able to do more. Remind her that if she is depressed, medications might be of help. Offer to get her to the doctor, pay for a prescription or two. In other words....offer a little managerial advice and a little hands on help for the time being. This is what families do and when we have someone hurting in our family, it seems logical that sometimes we might do a little extra. [B]However,[/B] I would NOT put your life on hold for your adult child. This is [B]extreme[/B] and it does not serve you well, nor does it teach your adult child any wisdom. My guess is that you have been putting your life on hold for too long. I agree... put one foot in front of the other and plow ahead with your plans. Good luck and good wishes. [/QUOTE]
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