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General Parenting
Need help with ADHD stepson and my son (ages 7 and 6)
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<blockquote data-quote="keista" data-source="post: 475693" data-attributes="member: 11965"><p>Hi and welcome!</p><p></p><p>FWIW, this is a VERY supportive community. However, it is also VERY realistic. The collective "we" of this board have seen, experienced, lived through and dealt with just about every possible parenting scenario there is. For example, in my home, all the knives, pointy scissors and power tools are out of DD1's (my oldest daughter) reach. I am *considering* bringing them back out because I am very comfortable with the fact that they had to get locked up due to a bad medication she was on. BUT they are all still locked up because I just don't really know if it's "safe" yet - maybe I'll never know. It's also important to mention that DD1 has much milder issues than many on this board. </p><p></p><p>Having said all that, I'll reaffirm that although it may seem that <strong>DDD</strong> is being a nay sayer, she is speaking the truth from an experienced an supportive (to you) point of view.</p><p></p><p>I get that you are in a committed relationship, but you aren't married - yet. So, one, you do have more (IOW "easier") options, and two, the "usual" welcome questions haven't been asked yet.</p><p></p><p>Who did the dxes on your stepson? How old was he at the time? Is he on any medication? Does he have behavior problems at school? Does he have an IEP? The answers to these can help us help you 'navigate' this boy and ultimately help you decide if you really want to stay in this relationship or not. </p><p></p><p><strong>IF</strong> you think you may want to be leaving this relationship, it would only be fair to everyone involved if you left sooner rather than later. If you decide to fully commit to it, you need to be REALLY sure you can manage in the long run while also keeping your son safe.</p><p></p><p>Now the 'buttinsky' me has a concern about you and your boyfriend. You've both lost spouses within the last two years. That alone can cause you to feel you have a deeper connection than actually exists. If the two of you actually met at some kind of grief support group, then the illusion can be even more intense. I am not saying that this is the case, but is a possibility, given your timeline. Love is deaf, dumb and blind, and you can both be really awesome ppl, but that doesn't necessarily mean you can make it work in the long run, and especially blending two children and one of them is a difficult child (gift from God - our term for a difficult child)</p><p></p><p>Again, welcome! <img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/emoticons/notalone.gif" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":notalone:" title="notalone :notalone:" data-shortname=":notalone:" /></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="keista, post: 475693, member: 11965"] Hi and welcome! FWIW, this is a VERY supportive community. However, it is also VERY realistic. The collective "we" of this board have seen, experienced, lived through and dealt with just about every possible parenting scenario there is. For example, in my home, all the knives, pointy scissors and power tools are out of DD1's (my oldest daughter) reach. I am *considering* bringing them back out because I am very comfortable with the fact that they had to get locked up due to a bad medication she was on. BUT they are all still locked up because I just don't really know if it's "safe" yet - maybe I'll never know. It's also important to mention that DD1 has much milder issues than many on this board. Having said all that, I'll reaffirm that although it may seem that [B]DDD[/B] is being a nay sayer, she is speaking the truth from an experienced an supportive (to you) point of view. I get that you are in a committed relationship, but you aren't married - yet. So, one, you do have more (IOW "easier") options, and two, the "usual" welcome questions haven't been asked yet. Who did the dxes on your stepson? How old was he at the time? Is he on any medication? Does he have behavior problems at school? Does he have an IEP? The answers to these can help us help you 'navigate' this boy and ultimately help you decide if you really want to stay in this relationship or not. [B]IF[/B] you think you may want to be leaving this relationship, it would only be fair to everyone involved if you left sooner rather than later. If you decide to fully commit to it, you need to be REALLY sure you can manage in the long run while also keeping your son safe. Now the 'buttinsky' me has a concern about you and your boyfriend. You've both lost spouses within the last two years. That alone can cause you to feel you have a deeper connection than actually exists. If the two of you actually met at some kind of grief support group, then the illusion can be even more intense. I am not saying that this is the case, but is a possibility, given your timeline. Love is deaf, dumb and blind, and you can both be really awesome ppl, but that doesn't necessarily mean you can make it work in the long run, and especially blending two children and one of them is a difficult child (gift from God - our term for a difficult child) Again, welcome! :notalone: [/QUOTE]
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Need help with ADHD stepson and my son (ages 7 and 6)
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