Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
Need help with an autistic teen
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="susiestar" data-source="post: 319271" data-attributes="member: 1233"><p>MWM is right on many levels. Part of the problem that the world has with people with Asperger's is that the Aspie truly does not understand that some people have authority over others, especially when they are in the "others" group.</p><p></p><p>Parents, teachers, other kids, they all seem the same to many people with autism spectrum disorders. "Normal" punishments and consequences do not work. (been there done that so many times I ripped up 3 tshirts because they were so worn out!) </p><p></p><p>For my Aspie we had to explain school and work as a game of sorts. Play the game and get happy parents and good grades and privileges. Play the game and get rewarded at work by having a job and getting paid to do it. </p><p></p><p>Chances are very high that your Aspie does NOT mean to be defiant, but is actually not "getting" the concept of peers and authority. It will be very slow going to explain this to him and to then get him to put it into actions. </p><p></p><p>Whatever your plan you MUST take teeny tiny baby steps. </p><p></p><p>Withholding visits with the grandparents is cruel, in my opinion. He NEEDS them, that totally unconditional love. He also may see them more as parents than he sees you and husband. Esp as you are the stepmom. Hopefully you and husband can work WITH the grandparents to encourage changes in your difficult child's life. It will take a LOT of openness, talk, and encouragement for your difficult child to make progress. But it CAN be done.</p><p></p><p>many hugs for each of you.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="susiestar, post: 319271, member: 1233"] MWM is right on many levels. Part of the problem that the world has with people with Asperger's is that the Aspie truly does not understand that some people have authority over others, especially when they are in the "others" group. Parents, teachers, other kids, they all seem the same to many people with autism spectrum disorders. "Normal" punishments and consequences do not work. (been there done that so many times I ripped up 3 tshirts because they were so worn out!) For my Aspie we had to explain school and work as a game of sorts. Play the game and get happy parents and good grades and privileges. Play the game and get rewarded at work by having a job and getting paid to do it. Chances are very high that your Aspie does NOT mean to be defiant, but is actually not "getting" the concept of peers and authority. It will be very slow going to explain this to him and to then get him to put it into actions. Whatever your plan you MUST take teeny tiny baby steps. Withholding visits with the grandparents is cruel, in my opinion. He NEEDS them, that totally unconditional love. He also may see them more as parents than he sees you and husband. Esp as you are the stepmom. Hopefully you and husband can work WITH the grandparents to encourage changes in your difficult child's life. It will take a LOT of openness, talk, and encouragement for your difficult child to make progress. But it CAN be done. many hugs for each of you. [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
Need help with an autistic teen
Top