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<blockquote data-quote="Suz" data-source="post: 83880" data-attributes="member: 29"><p>Tracy, tell us what's happening now. Is he transitioning home- kind of a step-down arrangement where he is coming home for weekends/holidays, etc? </p><p></p><p>What are their expectations?</p><p></p><p>What are YOUR expectations? Have you had a sit down with your husband to decide what YOU want? </p><p></p><p>Every family has different expectations. Once Rob was done with his Residential Treatment Center (RTC) he then went to a group home for a year. By that time he was 19 and never moved home again. I know that if he had, safety would have been a primary concern, as would no drugs/alcohol. If he's still in school you would need to outline your expectation there as well.</p><p></p><p>When we had contracts with Rob we had our expectation and the consequence on it in writing. It really helped to have everything outlined. And everyone signed and dated the contract.</p><p></p><p>We also let Rob have input in both the expectation area and the consequence area. That way, when he got in trouble we could say, "you decided this as much as we did." It shut him up pretty quick. lol</p><p></p><p>Unfortunately, contracts aren't foolproof and they don't deter bad behavior if the kid is determined (like Rob was) to be a difficult child.</p><p></p><p>Anyway, tell us more about where you are and what your expectations are and maybe we can help you drum up a workable plan. </p><p></p><p>Suz</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Suz, post: 83880, member: 29"] Tracy, tell us what's happening now. Is he transitioning home- kind of a step-down arrangement where he is coming home for weekends/holidays, etc? What are their expectations? What are YOUR expectations? Have you had a sit down with your husband to decide what YOU want? Every family has different expectations. Once Rob was done with his Residential Treatment Center (RTC) he then went to a group home for a year. By that time he was 19 and never moved home again. I know that if he had, safety would have been a primary concern, as would no drugs/alcohol. If he's still in school you would need to outline your expectation there as well. When we had contracts with Rob we had our expectation and the consequence on it in writing. It really helped to have everything outlined. And everyone signed and dated the contract. We also let Rob have input in both the expectation area and the consequence area. That way, when he got in trouble we could say, "you decided this as much as we did." It shut him up pretty quick. lol Unfortunately, contracts aren't foolproof and they don't deter bad behavior if the kid is determined (like Rob was) to be a difficult child. Anyway, tell us more about where you are and what your expectations are and maybe we can help you drum up a workable plan. Suz [/QUOTE]
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