Need help with my 17 year old son

dayatatime

Member
Are the notifications to the police in writing? Please make sure you have documentation-- paperwork is the language the system speaks.
 

GuideMe

Active Member
Why do you have to go to prove anything to these people? Let them KEEP him. Trust me, difficult child will be back in less than 3 weeks if you just let things happen naturally. I would NOT, I repeat, NOT meet up with these people, especially being as vulnerable as you are right now. They will see on their own, you know they will. Also, I don't know if this was already answered, but why isn't difficult child living with dad if they are so chummy?
 

Fmy

New Member
He doesn't live with his dad because his dad is abusive. While my son may make excuses for his dad, deep down he knows he can't live with him.

My son has already been gone for over a month. Yesterday I received papers from my exes attorney AGAIN. He is suing me AGAIN. Everything that he swore in court is a complete and total lie. He is also suing me for my kids again. I am so over dealing with his constant garbage.

On the bright side, the meeting seemed to go well. They confirmed all the information I shared and cracked down on my son. They even brought him by for my birthday. He apologized for his bad behavior. They told us that they did not plan for my son to stay with them permanently, they figured it would maybe be a week. He has agreed to go back to counseling and they agree with me that he needs it.
 

amelia d

Hope outweighs experience
Hi FMY,

" the meeting seemed to go well". So what happens after the week is up? Is he moving back with you? In with another friend? Like others on this board have expressed..(especially in light of the new law suit) you need to cover your back. I don't know what state you're from, but they all require parental responsibility for minors. If you have been assigned custody, or primary custody, you are responsible for him. That includes providing the basics of food, shelter and education. If you have decided to legally abdicate your parental rights of him; that's another story. I assume that your ex is trying to get out of paying child support and that is the reason behind his suit/custody battle. I would not trust that this other family (didn't you say they were friends with your ex?) is not trying to build a supporting case against your lack of parental responsibilities. Honestly, what do you know about their criminal, emotional or moral backgrounds? The fact that they did not discuss having your son show up and stay at their house is a BIG red flag to me. I guess I don't understand what the end goal is here. You seem happy with him living elsewhere (I get that..we've all wished our teens were someone else's problem at one time or another), but not with his father because of the abuse. Do you want him home with you? In a treatment facility? Group home?
I think you need to create a timeline of the incidents and what you have done in response to them. Get child services involved. Speak to an attorney. An objective third party, like a judge, may look at your actions as abandonment or neglect. (I'm not saying they were) If he will not be returning home, you need to make this legal. He may be placed in a halfway house or group home until he turns 18. You do not want to risk losing your daughter because of the way this situation may be perceived. Once it is in the hands of a judge or arbitrator, anything is possible.

Good luck...I hope it works out for everyone.
 

rc606

Member
I hope that your situation works itself out. I also agree that you should not meet these people, they will try to manipulate you. If you do go over there see if a Sheriff's deputy will go with you.

Also, being a new guy around here...what does difficult child mean?
 
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