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<blockquote data-quote="HMBgal" data-source="post: 721935" data-attributes="member: 13260"><p>Thanks all for your responses. He just turned 11. He was exposed to porn on his mother's phone through pictures she was sexting of herself a couple years ago. I don't now how graphic they were, but he told me then that he had seen this and that I had to talk to her; he was disturbed by it. She realized that he hacked into her phone and she looked at other sites he had gone to and they were pretty hard core. She said "Therapy type stuff hard core." About that time we got a call from a neighbor saying that he had shown her child porn.</p><p></p><p>As far as our 9 year old granddaughter is concerned, she is never out of our sight. Not because we fear for her, she is just a homebody. She has great friends at school that she has play dates with. She is the coolest kid ever. Her school isn't where I live. It's in the next town over, where her mother lives. Different school district completely. She was starting to be able to play with other kids around the corner in our neighborhood, but now she's been frozen out, too, because of the talk amongst the neighbors about fears about their kids because of grandson. What happens at her mother's house I don't know, but they are there so seldom these days. It's so sad. So so sad.</p><p></p><p>I don't know if grandson has been abused or not, I really don't. I was abused several times by strangers as a child and my parents never knew (lived on military bases, both parents non-functional and I was left alone for long periods of time and wandered about by myself). I was never physically hurt and I didn't understand at the time what was happening, but I do now. And to what extent that formed me as a child, I couldn't say.</p><p></p><p>There are some other things with two slightly older boys (12 and 13?) that live close next to the little boy that grandson is being accused of traumatizing that we've had trouble with and that have sent nasty, bullying texts to a friend of ours that has a son with problems similar to that of my grandson. They've had smartphones for years. The parents denied it that the boys did this, even when given proof. I have given us pause to wonder if this little boy is blaming grandson to protect these other boys because their mothers are friends and neighbors. But with the history, who will believe grandson? How do I tell him he's locked down because of these accusations? I wish I could wave a magic wand and get at the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth. </p><p></p><p>We are in Northern California and I will investigate the EDMR thing. What does acronym stand for?</p><p></p><p>Grandson is in a class, for the first time, with kids with emotional and behavioral disabilities, but that are on grade level, and in are at grade level (and in his case) above academic grade level. It's 7 kids, a good mix of boys and girls. I'm in Special Education and I mostly see classes full of boys. There is a county mental health worker that is hired as an outside contractor to do 1:1 visits weekly and also facilitates groups. She has mentioned that she sees bits of bi-polar in grandson, but isn't sure. She also wonders if there has been trauma and she asked if she could do an assessment to tease that out. We now that there were some bad things that happened with his father because CPS was contacted by grandson's psychiatrists and a file opened, but the file was closed because they couldn't find anything conclusive.</p><p></p><p>Grandson's IEP is next week and while I probably won't share this latest development, I will ask mental health worker about this assessment. Apparently certain parts of the brain are damaged with trauma and these tests (non-invasive, non-medical) can poke around that.</p><p></p><p>When you see grandson, and talk to him, he is sweet, caring, kind, loves animals, highly protective of his sister--tattles on her if he even hears a mild swear word from a video she's watching (You Tube Kids), sensitive to other peoples' moods, etc. But then there's the ADHD, anxiety, quick to anger over any perceived slight, inability to take responsibility for his own part in any disputes. He's working so hard and we keep thinking he's getting better because we've seen so much improvement in his behavior over the last year. I'm just gobsmacked.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="HMBgal, post: 721935, member: 13260"] Thanks all for your responses. He just turned 11. He was exposed to porn on his mother's phone through pictures she was sexting of herself a couple years ago. I don't now how graphic they were, but he told me then that he had seen this and that I had to talk to her; he was disturbed by it. She realized that he hacked into her phone and she looked at other sites he had gone to and they were pretty hard core. She said "Therapy type stuff hard core." About that time we got a call from a neighbor saying that he had shown her child porn. As far as our 9 year old granddaughter is concerned, she is never out of our sight. Not because we fear for her, she is just a homebody. She has great friends at school that she has play dates with. She is the coolest kid ever. Her school isn't where I live. It's in the next town over, where her mother lives. Different school district completely. She was starting to be able to play with other kids around the corner in our neighborhood, but now she's been frozen out, too, because of the talk amongst the neighbors about fears about their kids because of grandson. What happens at her mother's house I don't know, but they are there so seldom these days. It's so sad. So so sad. I don't know if grandson has been abused or not, I really don't. I was abused several times by strangers as a child and my parents never knew (lived on military bases, both parents non-functional and I was left alone for long periods of time and wandered about by myself). I was never physically hurt and I didn't understand at the time what was happening, but I do now. And to what extent that formed me as a child, I couldn't say. There are some other things with two slightly older boys (12 and 13?) that live close next to the little boy that grandson is being accused of traumatizing that we've had trouble with and that have sent nasty, bullying texts to a friend of ours that has a son with problems similar to that of my grandson. They've had smartphones for years. The parents denied it that the boys did this, even when given proof. I have given us pause to wonder if this little boy is blaming grandson to protect these other boys because their mothers are friends and neighbors. But with the history, who will believe grandson? How do I tell him he's locked down because of these accusations? I wish I could wave a magic wand and get at the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth. We are in Northern California and I will investigate the EDMR thing. What does acronym stand for? Grandson is in a class, for the first time, with kids with emotional and behavioral disabilities, but that are on grade level, and in are at grade level (and in his case) above academic grade level. It's 7 kids, a good mix of boys and girls. I'm in Special Education and I mostly see classes full of boys. There is a county mental health worker that is hired as an outside contractor to do 1:1 visits weekly and also facilitates groups. She has mentioned that she sees bits of bi-polar in grandson, but isn't sure. She also wonders if there has been trauma and she asked if she could do an assessment to tease that out. We now that there were some bad things that happened with his father because CPS was contacted by grandson's psychiatrists and a file opened, but the file was closed because they couldn't find anything conclusive. Grandson's IEP is next week and while I probably won't share this latest development, I will ask mental health worker about this assessment. Apparently certain parts of the brain are damaged with trauma and these tests (non-invasive, non-medical) can poke around that. When you see grandson, and talk to him, he is sweet, caring, kind, loves animals, highly protective of his sister--tattles on her if he even hears a mild swear word from a video she's watching (You Tube Kids), sensitive to other peoples' moods, etc. But then there's the ADHD, anxiety, quick to anger over any perceived slight, inability to take responsibility for his own part in any disputes. He's working so hard and we keep thinking he's getting better because we've seen so much improvement in his behavior over the last year. I'm just gobsmacked. [/QUOTE]
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