Hi everyone. I haven't been around for some months, attending to a lot of post-divorce legal and financial activity,but my older daughter, difficult child 1, needs my help. She is living nearby with her dad because I don't want her around her little sister (13 going on 18...) and because I can't take her lack of responsibility for herself. She is diagnosis'd with major depression, binge drinks on weekends or whenever she is able to (confided in me that she has had intercourse twice while under the influence but without her consent, that's right, date raped. One was an acquaintance she ended up with at a party, and the other, she was at a hotel party and was pushed into a closet and held in there. A young man started touching her and she couldn't fight him off). Is taking two classes at a local community college. Not working. Doesn't drive. I pay for her therapy and drive her to and from. I drive her to class one way (two towns away) and my ex picks her up. Her friends have all pretty much moved on adn she is stuck and I am exhausted from trying to help her. Things started to come to a head a few weeks ago adn she is bickering nonstop with her brother. The only time they bond as siblings is when they smoke weed together, and she is on Prozac and my son was hospitalized fora week in October with pneumonia (he is asthmatic and the smoking really worsened it, he got swine flu, then the tox tests came back positive for PCP, which had eroded lung tissue) and shouldn't be near any kind of smoke, not second hand, certainly not first hand. He is in substance abuse counsleing but it's a joke. He smokes just enought o stay under the radar of the testing and knows how to dilute his urine by drinking lots of water and two shots of wheatgrass juice from Robek's followed by an orange juice chaser. His sub abuse counselor sees difficult child 1 as a threat to his sobriety, so I'm thinking that maybe my daughter should go someplace for treatment. Long-term. But where? 28 days of rehab won't do it. She's too old for therapeutic boarding school. I've searched the web and spoken to several of her past therapists and no one can seem to pinpoint what type of away from home help would suit her best. She needs support, like access to a psychiatrist to manage her medications if she stays on them, and minimum once a week therapy, plus some kind of substance abuse treatmetn that she'll stick with, even going to AA meetings. I found a place in Vermont for young adults (17 - 30)that would allow her to learn basic living skills by living in an apartment setting with roommates and supervision, vocational counseling and possibly even attendikng a local comm college. Therapy is provided. The down side is: what happens when she comes home and nothing has magically changed? And is she even too fragile for the type of environment I described? She is open, vulnerable, naive. I don't want her to be around older people (late 20's) who are in a revolving door of abusing and rehab, and think that is her future. Do you think there are ed consultants out there who can find me someplace for her? I hired one in the past for my son but he, like many others I've heard about, pushed the six-week wilderness program followed by an "emotional growth" school. Some of these places border on the cultish and I'm not sure I want her turned into an automaton. I usually know what to do, but this time I'm really worried and frustrated. The only good thing is that she is cooperative and willing to do this, can't wait to get out of dad's house. Any ideas, parents? Thanks.