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<blockquote data-quote="slsh" data-source="post: 420549" data-attributes="member: 8"><p>thank you has been living down in our area for the past 7 months. I think he's been drug free. Still doing nothing - half-hearted attempts at getting a job, I can't even follow his excuses for no GED - but he *has* been (I think) relatively safe. </p><p></p><p>He's now alienated/been alienated from current housemates, and informed me yesterday he's moving back to the city as soon as his SSI check comes in, to live with X. X is a kid he met in Residential Treatment Center (RTC) #2, then found again after he left TLP. X... has issues. Already been in jail, ongoing court issues, at one point had thank you running scared because X threatened to kill thank you and thank you believed him. (The drama thank you is involved in is exhausting - for the most part, I try to stay blissfully unaware.)</p><p></p><p>Part of me wants to tell thank you to move back home. Downsides are he's still not doing a darn thing to get a life and there will be heck to pay with- Diva (who has developed her own set of issues, mainly over anger at thank you/me/Will for whatever - in therapy, refusing medications, generally being a royal typical teen-plus 99% of the time). Of course, there's that PTSD side of me that worries if he's here, he will ultimately revert back to the old thank you (familiarity breeds contempt) and we'll end up having an ugly situation trying to get him out, should the need arise. Upsides are there's a better chance of keeping him away from drugs (guaranteed he will start using again if he goes back to city), minimal (but better) chance of prodding him into getting a life, practical help for me in terms of caring for Boo, and ultimately there will be no major scrambling when he loses SSI, which is inevitable in my humble opinion because he's not on medications, not seeing therapist/psychiatrist.</p><p></p><p>He is not violent, has not been to my knowledge for 3-4 years. He is respectful of our rules when he's here, and appreciative of the comforts of home when he's here. Not so much a difficult child behavior-wise anymore... morphed into ditzy, unmotivated, drama-filled sloth. Kinda spacey, still atrocious ability to make plans, figure out steps, and then follow through.</p><p></p><p>Thoughts? Am I out of my mind for giving him an easy out? Is it reasonable to offer an alternative that will keep him away from drugs and other difficult child-like situations? Do I need to keep detachment in place and let him continue to fumble around, trying to find his way? It's been 2 years, and he's made zero progress.</p><p></p><p>Let me have it - honesty needed. Thanks, guys.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="slsh, post: 420549, member: 8"] thank you has been living down in our area for the past 7 months. I think he's been drug free. Still doing nothing - half-hearted attempts at getting a job, I can't even follow his excuses for no GED - but he *has* been (I think) relatively safe. He's now alienated/been alienated from current housemates, and informed me yesterday he's moving back to the city as soon as his SSI check comes in, to live with X. X is a kid he met in Residential Treatment Center (RTC) #2, then found again after he left TLP. X... has issues. Already been in jail, ongoing court issues, at one point had thank you running scared because X threatened to kill thank you and thank you believed him. (The drama thank you is involved in is exhausting - for the most part, I try to stay blissfully unaware.) Part of me wants to tell thank you to move back home. Downsides are he's still not doing a darn thing to get a life and there will be heck to pay with- Diva (who has developed her own set of issues, mainly over anger at thank you/me/Will for whatever - in therapy, refusing medications, generally being a royal typical teen-plus 99% of the time). Of course, there's that PTSD side of me that worries if he's here, he will ultimately revert back to the old thank you (familiarity breeds contempt) and we'll end up having an ugly situation trying to get him out, should the need arise. Upsides are there's a better chance of keeping him away from drugs (guaranteed he will start using again if he goes back to city), minimal (but better) chance of prodding him into getting a life, practical help for me in terms of caring for Boo, and ultimately there will be no major scrambling when he loses SSI, which is inevitable in my humble opinion because he's not on medications, not seeing therapist/psychiatrist. He is not violent, has not been to my knowledge for 3-4 years. He is respectful of our rules when he's here, and appreciative of the comforts of home when he's here. Not so much a difficult child behavior-wise anymore... morphed into ditzy, unmotivated, drama-filled sloth. Kinda spacey, still atrocious ability to make plans, figure out steps, and then follow through. Thoughts? Am I out of my mind for giving him an easy out? Is it reasonable to offer an alternative that will keep him away from drugs and other difficult child-like situations? Do I need to keep detachment in place and let him continue to fumble around, trying to find his way? It's been 2 years, and he's made zero progress. Let me have it - honesty needed. Thanks, guys. [/QUOTE]
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