Need some good luck for Mon afternoon

You are both in my thoughts.
difficult child is nearly 16 and I have homeschoooled all along except for charter school at age 6.
I am looking at options for the fall. She wants and psychiatrist is encouring not to homeschool. I have been doing online private school for 3 years so I could accomodate. She actually is almost though this but this year she has not been able to do much and the test at Residential Treatment Center (RTC) showed her doing 5th grade work in math, 4th in reading and vocab at 8th grade. Last year she did geometry,etc. I knew that since this fall , taht is indeed the level she is funciting at.
I am having two nerupsychs doen to determne level. I know since the runnign/drugging stuff in June, she has really regressed a lot acedemcially and socially.
I am still keeping up with her online stuff so she will get English , World History, Ecnomics credit and husband is helping with the chemistry credit.
She is doing math and reading there. She is reading Julius Caear, resarching BiPolar (BP), doing both badic amth and geometry and she is in a social skills group with soical stories. The teaher seems experinced at dealign with kids like my daughter. The focus dtill is more on behaviroe than pstcyhosocial.
difficult child sees public school as social time. At this point she is about on a 12 yea rold level in just about every respeict. How can she deal with the demands of a high school ? I knwo she can't without trmedous supports (aids/tutors/stucture)
I heaqr you about part time school and hs. That is what we have done the past 2 years with the sports and it is exhausting. She spent this year running and drugging and being very unstable. I donot know what is ralistic at this point.
I was so exhasuted trying to homeschool her and keep her safe. I am hoping to have some supports:aids/tutors. She wants to be "normal" .She is not. She is BiPolar (BP), has sustance abuse issues and pretty sure she is on the specturm ALso, deaf in one ear so that puts her behind. Just tryng to get her to the sports stuff,she was dongso much running and drugging and would refuse to go. Her plan is to do tons of working out,etc. but withut tons of supervison and she does not want me supervising her, she is so impulsive and a easy target. I will not have her back until she is stable and I have tons of supports :tutors,aids, etc.
There is an expensive priavte shcool that you can get scholorship to but I want to be realistice.
I can accomosate her and motivate her but she wants to conenct with others but her communication/social skills/impulsivity very low. She does not want to cooperte with me.
She also wants to play vartsiy volleyball. Thst is why we rented this aprtment so she needs to be either homeshooled or go to that school. The kids are actualy very nice and pretyaccpting but she ws insiting on rejecting them and acting out with really scary druggies. Athletically she is tops but soically, maturity wise, and impulse wide, she is verylow. Change is very difficult for her. Last fall, I just put the focus on keeping her from running away and going to meeting, doing art, exercisng,eating decently. She still was stealing,running by insiting to go to this other house all the time and then her behaviors got exreme and they did not want her aroudn any more. She would go over there and use the computer and act out with boys becasue I would not allow that here. She would not do volleyball, church gorup. The last 3 weeks before Residential Treatment Center (RTC), she was running away and using sustances and in psycotic rages here. In 6 weeks, she is more stable, but I knwo it is huge road back. I am looking at her behavior and not agreeing to anything without tons of supports for the sefety of me and our family.
I am hoping with a diagnosis of her being on the speictrum , I can get some supports in place. She could also go to intesive out=patient but I want to keep her realsitcally safe and protected.
I like the online schol: it is challenging but difficult child sturggles a lot with verbal stuff. She could dictate to me, etc. But when she was pschotic, she I would say tiem to do school, and she would rage on me physcially and then keep runningto inappropritae people.
She says shewants to be a vet. I just want her stable :) She was bvoluntering at Humane Society. They offered her a job! She can barely functin though right now.
Mainly what she was doing was running away,etc. She writes up plan taht seh wil get up, take bus to school: and I donot think this is realistc but it is soexhasuting trying to homeschool her. She basiclaly was not abe to focus this year but I hope the sencouragment and support will be possible.
The assessments will give me a bettr idea reiht where she is at. Actually I know: it varies day to day . I know she needs flexiblity, support, encouragment, chunking the work,etc.
Before this pychoitc break adn using subatances and other addictive behavior, I thought she would be gettign college prep diploma and then going to a small colelge and playing volleyball. Now I rally just don Occupational Therapist (OT) know what is realistic.
I still see tons of positves in homeschooling but she wants and needs outside stuff but she cannot jsut "snap out of it" or live up to the pressures and expectatins of a high school level.
She needs tremenedous support and supervison.
I am researching all the options: I will call the shcool board: she has never had an assmessment. I have rally trie dto avoid the public shcools except she has palyed spoerts for them the last 2 seasons.
The optins are a large urban public high school (where she plays volleyall), private affluent high shcool, Catholic high school, school that is 3 days a week and homeshcool, small private high school, there is a small charter high shool for kids with LDs, there are also schools about an hour away with self contained classroom, there is a school for kids with severe speicla needs, there is dual enrollement at the local community college with fine arts classes, there is hoomeschooling with utilzing tutors, there is also a magnet school that has like voc tech stuff, there is also a private alernative shcool that is very non-tradiional . If Residential Treatment Center (RTC) seems to contue to be indicated, I found one tht deals with complex nerulogical issues (hard of hearing/ autistic, BiPolar (BP)) She could get a GED. I alwsy wanted to keep her aout of schools unti college. DID not realize exgtent of her illnesses until last summer.
The issue with her is her impulse conrola nd scocial skills and communication skills are so delayed that eventhough shelooks very intelligent,etc.,realsitcally she can't deal and goes toward the bottom feeders for peer connection. She is extremly creative . She has a lto of artistic and athletic gifts. The idea was to work with her some acedecmially and then purse these gifts but she hs instied on running, drugging: been veryour of control. I would turn my bak, sna she would steal or take off.
I would like her home with tons of supports:tutors, aids, etc. I just can't go back kto her constant running away, drug use,stealing,pwycotic rages.
I want challnge, flexiblity,suport,and encourgment for her. She wants to be "normal". My feeligns about schools: control, consumeristic, and focus on conformity.
I really wanted her to get this college prep diploma but she wants to hang with sother:she did it this past year:she needs tons of suporvison.It is diffuclt for her to do acemics but she can do it. Her self-setteem is very low. I am trying to support her stability but ralsitcally I just don't know. She has fougt me on the online stuff for 3 years now:she wanted to go to shcool for the perceived soical ops. I see it as even more ops to connect with bottom feeders. She was dong this even with so many pistive ops. She is an ill young lady. I thnk I will get on BiPolar (BP) homechooling support group on CABF.
Compassion
 

TerryJ2

Well-Known Member
How exhausting, Compassion!

She's more than a handful. Neat that the humane society offered her a job, though!

It would be wonderful if she could experience a sense of stability for a prolonged period. Looks like her medications only help a tiny bit.

I wish you lots and lots of luck.
 

rejectedmom

New Member
Good luck Terry, I wish I had never allowed my so to go back to the public school in HS. I really think that he would have had a much better outcome if I had told him no and left him in the Christian school he was in. They even offered to take him back after difficult child got sent to the alternative school. husband and difficult child said no because difficult child was supposed to get tech training at the alternative school which was unavailable at the private school. In the end he didn't get it anyway but did get hooked up with really bad kids which lead him down an alternative and very negative path . -RM
 

TerryJ2

Well-Known Member
Thank you!

husband thinks that the other Christian school I looked at was not academically challenging and too religious. This, from a devout Baptist, LOL!

Fingers crossed. I leave in 1/2 hr.
 

TerryJ2

Well-Known Member
Thank you.

Unfortunately, when his friends asked him where he was going, he told them the truth.

I was hoping he would just shrug his shoulders ... I didn't want the teachers to know and perhaps just write him off for next yr. I wanted this to be an OPTION.

Kids. Arg!
 
Sorry difficult child told his friends about where he was going. difficult child 2 would probably do the same thing. Anyway, I've got my fingers crossed that things went well this afternoon and every available option is open for you to consider. WFEN
 
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