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Need Some Help for My Friend's Son with Aspergers ........
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 363248" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>Marg, I hear ya.</p><p></p><p>However, when you are so life-imparied sometimes intelligence isn't enough. My son is book smart (as is my friend's son...he is BRILLIANT) but my son is also life skills imparied and very unsure of himself. A harsh boss would scare him. High expectations would make him panic and be unable to perform. I don't know if this will be the case forever, but I am guessing that son will work through our Job Services Program, which finds jobs for disabled kids. That way the boss will be more understanding. Otherwise..they're not. I suspect L. will not fully mature until about 25 and then we'll see how well he can compensate for his social deficits. And he's been getting intense help for them all of his life, both in school, at home with us and in the community. If he hadn't, I don't think there'd be ANY chance he can someday find a decent job. Unfortunately, although my son is smart, he is not particularly skilled in anything that gets one a good job. He has a fabulous memory, just like my friend's son, but it's rote. He has a lot of trouble with abstract thinking and multi-tasking, both needed for most jobs (other than McDonalds). At this point in time, he will need a job with a lot of reptition and will be proud of his work, even if it's not prestigious. He's not at all worried about what others think of him. On the plus side he has a fabulously winning personality and everyone loves him. That will help him get along in the work force. He is also highly compliant, loves to please, and is extremely responsible. So..we are going to slow down L's "matureness" curb. His diagnosis was actually Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD)-not otherwise specified and he had a speech delay. He has just come along so far they changed it to High-Functioning Autism (HFA) or sometimes Aspergers. </p><p></p><p>As for homeschooling here, without any accountability at all (and I do mean NONE) at least in many states you can neither get anyone to look over the work you are doing with your child nor test the child nor utilize the public school system. Most homeschooling parents want the government OUT of their child's education completely...they feel the government doesn't do a good job...and that is how it is in most states. You simply need to send a note to the Dept. of Publi Education that you are homeschooling...and you never hear from them again. That's why homeschooling was such a struggle for me. If we hit a bump there was nowhere to turn and I couldn't have the kids tested with the school kids to see how they were doing. Again, this varies state-to-state, but I think our state is pretty much the norm. Americans tend to dislike government and the government often backs out and let's us do it our way. Therefore, if you homeschool, you'd better be a dang good teacher who doesn't need much direction...or else know somebody who IS a darn good teacher who can help you. So it's a bit more complicated here. In our state, the kids can not participate in public school sports or any activities if they are homeschooled. </p><p></p><p>A lot of our homeschooling is done by religious folks who object to the school curriculum or those whose kids have done so poorly at school that the parents are (rightly) sick of dealing with them and would rather try themselves. I think California and NY do require some accountability, but I'm not sure. It's not on the level where you have a teacher who signs off on the work that your kid does, I don't believe. Pretty much if you choose to leave the school district and do it at home, you are not given any problem, but don't expect any help either. None. So it's a hard decision.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 363248, member: 1550"] Marg, I hear ya. However, when you are so life-imparied sometimes intelligence isn't enough. My son is book smart (as is my friend's son...he is BRILLIANT) but my son is also life skills imparied and very unsure of himself. A harsh boss would scare him. High expectations would make him panic and be unable to perform. I don't know if this will be the case forever, but I am guessing that son will work through our Job Services Program, which finds jobs for disabled kids. That way the boss will be more understanding. Otherwise..they're not. I suspect L. will not fully mature until about 25 and then we'll see how well he can compensate for his social deficits. And he's been getting intense help for them all of his life, both in school, at home with us and in the community. If he hadn't, I don't think there'd be ANY chance he can someday find a decent job. Unfortunately, although my son is smart, he is not particularly skilled in anything that gets one a good job. He has a fabulous memory, just like my friend's son, but it's rote. He has a lot of trouble with abstract thinking and multi-tasking, both needed for most jobs (other than McDonalds). At this point in time, he will need a job with a lot of reptition and will be proud of his work, even if it's not prestigious. He's not at all worried about what others think of him. On the plus side he has a fabulously winning personality and everyone loves him. That will help him get along in the work force. He is also highly compliant, loves to please, and is extremely responsible. So..we are going to slow down L's "matureness" curb. His diagnosis was actually Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD)-not otherwise specified and he had a speech delay. He has just come along so far they changed it to High-Functioning Autism (HFA) or sometimes Aspergers. As for homeschooling here, without any accountability at all (and I do mean NONE) at least in many states you can neither get anyone to look over the work you are doing with your child nor test the child nor utilize the public school system. Most homeschooling parents want the government OUT of their child's education completely...they feel the government doesn't do a good job...and that is how it is in most states. You simply need to send a note to the Dept. of Publi Education that you are homeschooling...and you never hear from them again. That's why homeschooling was such a struggle for me. If we hit a bump there was nowhere to turn and I couldn't have the kids tested with the school kids to see how they were doing. Again, this varies state-to-state, but I think our state is pretty much the norm. Americans tend to dislike government and the government often backs out and let's us do it our way. Therefore, if you homeschool, you'd better be a dang good teacher who doesn't need much direction...or else know somebody who IS a darn good teacher who can help you. So it's a bit more complicated here. In our state, the kids can not participate in public school sports or any activities if they are homeschooled. A lot of our homeschooling is done by religious folks who object to the school curriculum or those whose kids have done so poorly at school that the parents are (rightly) sick of dealing with them and would rather try themselves. I think California and NY do require some accountability, but I'm not sure. It's not on the level where you have a teacher who signs off on the work that your kid does, I don't believe. Pretty much if you choose to leave the school district and do it at home, you are not given any problem, but don't expect any help either. None. So it's a hard decision. [/QUOTE]
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