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Need words of wisdom please!
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<blockquote data-quote="MyFriendKita" data-source="post: 310000" data-attributes="member: 4888"><p>Impulsive, explosive, and doesn't think about consequences. I definitely can relate to that.</p><p></p><p>You're in a really tough spot. I think about the only thing you can do in this situation is try and keep the lines of communication open with her and try not to set her off. I don't mean let her walk all over you, but I would try not to rock the boat. I have a sister who is unstable--her husband died when her youngest daughter was three (she was unstable before that, but she became really bad after he died).</p><p></p><p>After several blowups with her (mainly when I tried to talk her into getting mental health help), I decided the most important thing is preserving the relationship with my niece (she's nine now). Like you, we were very worried about my niece's welfare, with good reason. However, none of the reasons were severe enough to warrant CPS taking her away from my sister. It seems to be very difficult to get a child taken away from its mother, and even if you do manage it for a short time, reunification of the family is usually the goal. By staying in her life, we're better able to monitor whether she's okay or not. During the times my sister shut us out of their lives, we just had to hope and pray nothing bad happened.</p><p></p><p>I just do my very best to avoid any confrontations with my sister. If she starts ranting and raving, I just try and change the subject. It helps that my sister needs me for help with things, like rides to the store, grocery money now and then. But I don't make any suggestions to her about anything. If she asks, I'll tell her I read an article about whatever and in the article, it said to do x. I let her think she's the best mother in the world. </p><p></p><p>I hope motherhood does turn your daughter around.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="MyFriendKita, post: 310000, member: 4888"] Impulsive, explosive, and doesn't think about consequences. I definitely can relate to that. You're in a really tough spot. I think about the only thing you can do in this situation is try and keep the lines of communication open with her and try not to set her off. I don't mean let her walk all over you, but I would try not to rock the boat. I have a sister who is unstable--her husband died when her youngest daughter was three (she was unstable before that, but she became really bad after he died). After several blowups with her (mainly when I tried to talk her into getting mental health help), I decided the most important thing is preserving the relationship with my niece (she's nine now). Like you, we were very worried about my niece's welfare, with good reason. However, none of the reasons were severe enough to warrant CPS taking her away from my sister. It seems to be very difficult to get a child taken away from its mother, and even if you do manage it for a short time, reunification of the family is usually the goal. By staying in her life, we're better able to monitor whether she's okay or not. During the times my sister shut us out of their lives, we just had to hope and pray nothing bad happened. I just do my very best to avoid any confrontations with my sister. If she starts ranting and raving, I just try and change the subject. It helps that my sister needs me for help with things, like rides to the store, grocery money now and then. But I don't make any suggestions to her about anything. If she asks, I'll tell her I read an article about whatever and in the article, it said to do x. I let her think she's the best mother in the world. I hope motherhood does turn your daughter around. [/QUOTE]
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