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Parent Emeritus
Needing to stay strong, feeling like a horrible person. :(
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<blockquote data-quote="Blindsided" data-source="post: 749634" data-attributes="member: 23811"><p>Enabling is also disabling, for everyone involved. I so wish I would have known the difference between enabling and helping long ago. There are many ways people are disabled, physical, mental, addiction, etc. etc. I can only tell you what I found and what many here have expressed, if you let your daughter stay when you are not there, how is that helping her move forward? Always have a backup plan, what do you do with her when you return? It will be very easy for her and you to slip back into the enabled/enabling relationship. She has made a great stride towards independence. If there is a way to help her celebrate her achievement, that is helping her. I wish my daughter who was once able bodied, but now dying from her long-term alcoholism and I now suspect drugs (in onther state, homeless, couch surfing, 40 y/o), would have gotten a job. It's is tough. I will be thinking of you.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Blindsided, post: 749634, member: 23811"] Enabling is also disabling, for everyone involved. I so wish I would have known the difference between enabling and helping long ago. There are many ways people are disabled, physical, mental, addiction, etc. etc. I can only tell you what I found and what many here have expressed, if you let your daughter stay when you are not there, how is that helping her move forward? Always have a backup plan, what do you do with her when you return? It will be very easy for her and you to slip back into the enabled/enabling relationship. She has made a great stride towards independence. If there is a way to help her celebrate her achievement, that is helping her. I wish my daughter who was once able bodied, but now dying from her long-term alcoholism and I now suspect drugs (in onther state, homeless, couch surfing, 40 y/o), would have gotten a job. It's is tough. I will be thinking of you. [/QUOTE]
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Needing to stay strong, feeling like a horrible person. :(
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