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<blockquote data-quote="flutterby" data-source="post: 391131" data-attributes="member: 7083"><p>I'm sorry it took me so long to respond.</p><p></p><p>The interventions are essentially the same as you would have with an Aspie child. Our children are deceiving because they are highly verbal (it was like talking to a 40 year old when my daughter was 2), and are very good at mimicking and compensating. They do get to an age, however, when it becomes harder to do - generally the upper elementary grades when they are expected to work more independently. However, as you know, those are only the issues that everyone else sees. We see the differences way before.</p><p></p><p>I am still surprised by the things that "stump" my difficult child (for lack of a better word). She is very literal. For example, if you say, "We'll play it by ear", she has no idea what that means. It's funny because when you break it down and explain these things, you realize how silly our expressions sound. It's just that we've always heard them and understood what they meant. When you have to explain them, well they don't make any sense. And that's how they perceive it from the get go. </p><p></p><p>Other things - </p><p></p><p>It took years for her to get sarcasm and if there isn't enough inflection, she still won't. When she was younger, I had to be overly animated when I was being facetious. </p><p></p><p>Repetition is key with these kids. They *do* get things, it just takes them longer - especially more complicated tasks/problems. Things have to be broken down into very simple steps. We recently told my daughter's teachers that when they explain things to her (schoolwork), explain them as if she were a 7 year old. She is very smart, but you really have to break things down. She doesn't catch things that are implied, or inferred, and if you leave out a step, her mind won't take that jump.</p><p></p><p>Social skills are generally quite lacking, though they crave friendship. This has caused a lot of hurt for my daughter. There are social skills books that can help with this.</p><p></p><p>Our kids have trouble with organization, planning, and setting goals. When you ask your son to do something, tell him one thing at a time. For example, instead of saying, "It's time for you to put on your jammies, brush your teeth, and get your things ready for tomorrow", first have him put on his jammies, then tell him to brush his teeth, then have him get things ready for the next day. The former is too many things at once and it will be overwhelming and he won't know how to plan it out. You can also use a checklist so he knows what he needs to do every night and can mark it off. They also do better with structure - which is a hard one for me because I'm not a structured person.</p><p></p><p>When he interrupts you on the phone and you say, "I'm on the phone", and he responds with, "I didn't know", and you're wondering how could he not know cause you're holding the phone in your hand - he really didn't know. He didn't see it. Well, he saw it but his brain didn't process it. Which is why they are horrible at looking for things they can't find. My daughter still calls me in because she can't find something in her room and I move one or two things and there it is. She has gotten better, but I've had to repeatedly show her how to look under things, behind things, move things, etc.</p><p></p><p>Those are just things off the top of my head. Each child's strength and weaknesses are going to differ, but I think those are some pretty common ones.</p><p></p><p>Hope this helps.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="flutterby, post: 391131, member: 7083"] I'm sorry it took me so long to respond. The interventions are essentially the same as you would have with an Aspie child. Our children are deceiving because they are highly verbal (it was like talking to a 40 year old when my daughter was 2), and are very good at mimicking and compensating. They do get to an age, however, when it becomes harder to do - generally the upper elementary grades when they are expected to work more independently. However, as you know, those are only the issues that everyone else sees. We see the differences way before. I am still surprised by the things that "stump" my difficult child (for lack of a better word). She is very literal. For example, if you say, "We'll play it by ear", she has no idea what that means. It's funny because when you break it down and explain these things, you realize how silly our expressions sound. It's just that we've always heard them and understood what they meant. When you have to explain them, well they don't make any sense. And that's how they perceive it from the get go. Other things - It took years for her to get sarcasm and if there isn't enough inflection, she still won't. When she was younger, I had to be overly animated when I was being facetious. Repetition is key with these kids. They *do* get things, it just takes them longer - especially more complicated tasks/problems. Things have to be broken down into very simple steps. We recently told my daughter's teachers that when they explain things to her (schoolwork), explain them as if she were a 7 year old. She is very smart, but you really have to break things down. She doesn't catch things that are implied, or inferred, and if you leave out a step, her mind won't take that jump. Social skills are generally quite lacking, though they crave friendship. This has caused a lot of hurt for my daughter. There are social skills books that can help with this. Our kids have trouble with organization, planning, and setting goals. When you ask your son to do something, tell him one thing at a time. For example, instead of saying, "It's time for you to put on your jammies, brush your teeth, and get your things ready for tomorrow", first have him put on his jammies, then tell him to brush his teeth, then have him get things ready for the next day. The former is too many things at once and it will be overwhelming and he won't know how to plan it out. You can also use a checklist so he knows what he needs to do every night and can mark it off. They also do better with structure - which is a hard one for me because I'm not a structured person. When he interrupts you on the phone and you say, "I'm on the phone", and he responds with, "I didn't know", and you're wondering how could he not know cause you're holding the phone in your hand - he really didn't know. He didn't see it. Well, he saw it but his brain didn't process it. Which is why they are horrible at looking for things they can't find. My daughter still calls me in because she can't find something in her room and I move one or two things and there it is. She has gotten better, but I've had to repeatedly show her how to look under things, behind things, move things, etc. Those are just things off the top of my head. Each child's strength and weaknesses are going to differ, but I think those are some pretty common ones. Hope this helps. [/QUOTE]
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