Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
New and need some advice! (long!)
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="allie80" data-source="post: 161680" data-attributes="member: 5374"><p>Well I do believe it is a result of our inconsistent parenting. husband works second shift and I work in the morning. We see each other in passing. </p><p>We are VERY different in our parenting styles and I'm pretty sure TJ doesn't know which end is up at this point. We have been working through feeling like failures for the past few days. Almost like a wake up call to say - LOOK at what you are doing to your children. </p><p>I have dealt (not so well at times) with depression for the past 14 years. I was diagnosis as having bipolar back in 2000 but I have been off medications for years sans when my kids were born and then I had PPD. It makes me wonder if I actually had bipolar since I needed the medications for anxiety mostly which Lexapro helped with after Emma was born. </p><p>So, yes, there is a history. But, that whole realm scares me and I am praying that we did it with our crappy parenting and it isn't anything neurological. I know what it is like to not feel right and I can't imagine a life like that for my chidlren.</p><p>Sorry to sidetrack...</p><p>husband is tired. He works 12 - 14 hours a day and then he has them at 7:00am and they are ready to go. He isn't. He wants to sleep and not be who they need him to be. They are off the walls in the morning. We constantly argue about that which isn't helping obviously.</p><p>I come home at noon, they get up from their nap and then off we go. I might nap (a bad habit I acquired during a bad spell of depression) and no one is holding the kids accountable for what they are doing. </p><p>I have been trying to do better with that and give them activities or let them play outside since it is warm out now but TJ still needs 110&#37; attention. He has not been getting that and I readily and ashamedly admit that. </p><p>I know it needs to begin with us. </p><p>Am I in denial that it might be something more serious? I don't know. I want to cry and hate on myself for letting it get away like this. </p><p>Everyone says, well you are taking the first step and that is important and people are proud we are doing something. I'm just disappointed that he is a product of our inconsistency and craziness. </p><p>by the way, husband has depression, he just hasn't been diagnosis. More job/stress related though. Not anxiety so much as feeling helpless in situations, etc. </p><p> </p><p>So, thats a lil more background. </p><p>I still have not heard from anyone at the Child and Youth Services program we have here in central PA and I am going to call them today. They have a great program so I at least want to get him evaulated and then we'll go from there. </p><p>In the meantime, we have behavior charts, incentive charts, concrete actions/consequences and now its just putting it all into effect. </p><p> </p><p>Thank you very much for your responses. </p><p>I love him with all my might. I wish that was enough to fix this.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="allie80, post: 161680, member: 5374"] Well I do believe it is a result of our inconsistent parenting. husband works second shift and I work in the morning. We see each other in passing. We are VERY different in our parenting styles and I'm pretty sure TJ doesn't know which end is up at this point. We have been working through feeling like failures for the past few days. Almost like a wake up call to say - LOOK at what you are doing to your children. I have dealt (not so well at times) with depression for the past 14 years. I was diagnosis as having bipolar back in 2000 but I have been off medications for years sans when my kids were born and then I had PPD. It makes me wonder if I actually had bipolar since I needed the medications for anxiety mostly which Lexapro helped with after Emma was born. So, yes, there is a history. But, that whole realm scares me and I am praying that we did it with our crappy parenting and it isn't anything neurological. I know what it is like to not feel right and I can't imagine a life like that for my chidlren. Sorry to sidetrack... husband is tired. He works 12 - 14 hours a day and then he has them at 7:00am and they are ready to go. He isn't. He wants to sleep and not be who they need him to be. They are off the walls in the morning. We constantly argue about that which isn't helping obviously. I come home at noon, they get up from their nap and then off we go. I might nap (a bad habit I acquired during a bad spell of depression) and no one is holding the kids accountable for what they are doing. I have been trying to do better with that and give them activities or let them play outside since it is warm out now but TJ still needs 110% attention. He has not been getting that and I readily and ashamedly admit that. I know it needs to begin with us. Am I in denial that it might be something more serious? I don't know. I want to cry and hate on myself for letting it get away like this. Everyone says, well you are taking the first step and that is important and people are proud we are doing something. I'm just disappointed that he is a product of our inconsistency and craziness. by the way, husband has depression, he just hasn't been diagnosis. More job/stress related though. Not anxiety so much as feeling helpless in situations, etc. So, thats a lil more background. I still have not heard from anyone at the Child and Youth Services program we have here in central PA and I am going to call them today. They have a great program so I at least want to get him evaulated and then we'll go from there. In the meantime, we have behavior charts, incentive charts, concrete actions/consequences and now its just putting it all into effect. Thank you very much for your responses. I love him with all my might. I wish that was enough to fix this. [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
New and need some advice! (long!)
Top