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New and need some advice! (long!)
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<blockquote data-quote="Marguerite" data-source="post: 166695" data-attributes="member: 1991"><p>Shamrock, welcome. You sound like a caring stepmother. You also need to get some help for your own situation, but to get the best help possible from this site you need to start your own thread; you could get your call for help lost down here at the tail end of someone else's problem.</p><p></p><p>Try going to General forum and beginning a thread there, because your prospective stepdaughter is probably too old for the Early Childhood thread to be of much help.</p><p></p><p>ODD symptoms can be seen in children with a range of different conditions. Whether ODD exists independently is still a matter of debate, which I won't buy into here. However, if it's not actually ODD, something that looks very much like it can be caused by discipline techniques which work for 99&#37; of the population, simply being 'wrong' for kids with various problems.</p><p></p><p>We recommend, among other things, a read of "The Explosive Child" by Ross Greene. There is some discussion on this book as it can be applied to younger children, at the top of this early Childhood forum. The book gives you a different way of dealing with a kid for whom the usual discipline methods do not seem to be working. If a kid has high levels of frustration, a short fuse, a quick temper, any language issues (or other communication issues) or a tendency to be particularly obsessive, perseverative or similar, then they often need a different approach. It is also a discipline method that can be applied to easy child kids too, so you don't have to treat them too differently. </p><p></p><p>If a discipline method is not working, you may as well not use it. There are better ways.</p><p></p><p>Shamrock, I look forward to reading about your family over in General!</p><p></p><p>Marg</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Marguerite, post: 166695, member: 1991"] Shamrock, welcome. You sound like a caring stepmother. You also need to get some help for your own situation, but to get the best help possible from this site you need to start your own thread; you could get your call for help lost down here at the tail end of someone else's problem. Try going to General forum and beginning a thread there, because your prospective stepdaughter is probably too old for the Early Childhood thread to be of much help. ODD symptoms can be seen in children with a range of different conditions. Whether ODD exists independently is still a matter of debate, which I won't buy into here. However, if it's not actually ODD, something that looks very much like it can be caused by discipline techniques which work for 99% of the population, simply being 'wrong' for kids with various problems. We recommend, among other things, a read of "The Explosive Child" by Ross Greene. There is some discussion on this book as it can be applied to younger children, at the top of this early Childhood forum. The book gives you a different way of dealing with a kid for whom the usual discipline methods do not seem to be working. If a kid has high levels of frustration, a short fuse, a quick temper, any language issues (or other communication issues) or a tendency to be particularly obsessive, perseverative or similar, then they often need a different approach. It is also a discipline method that can be applied to easy child kids too, so you don't have to treat them too differently. If a discipline method is not working, you may as well not use it. There are better ways. Shamrock, I look forward to reading about your family over in General! Marg [/QUOTE]
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