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New future Step-Mom needs help with probable ODD child
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<blockquote data-quote="Peace Please" data-source="post: 417386" data-attributes="member: 11492"><p><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'">Thank you everyone for your suggestions and support. I have ordered a copy of "The Explosive Child" and my DF and I are both going to read it. I truly believe that LittlePeace has decided that he doesn't want a mother anymore. He just wants to hang out with the boys and do boy things, and who can blame him? His drug-abusing mother abandoned him and his step-mother never really loved him. She has two kids of her own, and never paid any attention to him anyway. He hasn't seen or heard from his mother for more than a year, and she lives in the same city, knows where my DF works, knows where my DF's parents live and knows where most of my DF's family lives. My DF decided years ago that LittlePeace did not belong with his mother. He became the sole guardian when the difficult child was 8 months old, and has been taking care of him ever since. </span></span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'">The difficult child has been evaluated many times since he was about 4 years old. Addreal was prescribed when he was 8 for the ADHD. He was on that for three years, but he stopped growing and lost too much weight, so he was taken off the medications. He has been seeing a therapist since then, but he tells the therapist what he wants to hear, and leads the therapist to believe nothing is wrong with HIM, and everyone else is just lying about his behavior. He has an appointment this coming Friday with the therapist, and I have been talking to my psychiatrist throughout all of this. That has really helped me deal with this. My DF has said that if this behavior continues, the difficult child may need to go to the hospital and be evaluated by someone else, and maybe be admitted. </span></span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span style="font-size: 12px">LittlePeace's step-mom got him a cell phone for his birthday (God only knows why), which has been LOTS of fun. He is at his great-grandma's for spring-break (one of the women he will behave for - she's FEISTY!! LOL), but he has been texting me and his dad all day, telling us he's bored. He has his books, TV and a game system over there, just like here, and that's what he'd be doing at home (if he isn't being punished). I know he just wants to be home with me all week, bugging me, because he told us this. Well, my DF called him, and told him that if he didn't stop, and if he keeps doing that, at all this whole week, he will lose all priveleges over there too. I give it two hours. </span></span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span style="font-size: 12px">Has anyone found it helpful to not tell a child like this when something gets to them? It seems to just make LittlePeace want to do whatever is annoying either of us even more. By the way, my DF spoke to his boss, and will no longer be working so many hours a week. He will be working a normal 40-hour week from now on, which will be WONDERFUL! Now, I will only be by myself with LittlePeace for an hour and a half each evening before my DF gets home. </span></span></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Peace Please, post: 417386, member: 11492"] [SIZE=3][FONT=Times New Roman]Thank you everyone for your suggestions and support. I have ordered a copy of "The Explosive Child" and my DF and I are both going to read it. I truly believe that LittlePeace has decided that he doesn't want a mother anymore. He just wants to hang out with the boys and do boy things, and who can blame him? His drug-abusing mother abandoned him and his step-mother never really loved him. She has two kids of her own, and never paid any attention to him anyway. He hasn't seen or heard from his mother for more than a year, and she lives in the same city, knows where my DF works, knows where my DF's parents live and knows where most of my DF's family lives. My DF decided years ago that LittlePeace did not belong with his mother. He became the sole guardian when the difficult child was 8 months old, and has been taking care of him ever since. [/FONT][/SIZE] [SIZE=3][FONT=Times New Roman] [/FONT][/SIZE] [SIZE=3][FONT=Times New Roman]The difficult child has been evaluated many times since he was about 4 years old. Addreal was prescribed when he was 8 for the ADHD. He was on that for three years, but he stopped growing and lost too much weight, so he was taken off the medications. He has been seeing a therapist since then, but he tells the therapist what he wants to hear, and leads the therapist to believe nothing is wrong with HIM, and everyone else is just lying about his behavior. He has an appointment this coming Friday with the therapist, and I have been talking to my psychiatrist throughout all of this. That has really helped me deal with this. My DF has said that if this behavior continues, the difficult child may need to go to the hospital and be evaluated by someone else, and maybe be admitted. [/FONT][/SIZE] [FONT=Times New Roman][SIZE=3][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Times New Roman][SIZE=3]LittlePeace's step-mom got him a cell phone for his birthday (God only knows why), which has been LOTS of fun. He is at his great-grandma's for spring-break (one of the women he will behave for - she's FEISTY!! LOL), but he has been texting me and his dad all day, telling us he's bored. He has his books, TV and a game system over there, just like here, and that's what he'd be doing at home (if he isn't being punished). I know he just wants to be home with me all week, bugging me, because he told us this. Well, my DF called him, and told him that if he didn't stop, and if he keeps doing that, at all this whole week, he will lose all priveleges over there too. I give it two hours. [/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Times New Roman][SIZE=3][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Times New Roman][SIZE=3]Has anyone found it helpful to not tell a child like this when something gets to them? It seems to just make LittlePeace want to do whatever is annoying either of us even more. By the way, my DF spoke to his boss, and will no longer be working so many hours a week. He will be working a normal 40-hour week from now on, which will be WONDERFUL! Now, I will only be by myself with LittlePeace for an hour and a half each evening before my DF gets home. [/SIZE][/FONT] [/QUOTE]
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