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General Parenting
New here- 7 y/o son with ADHD/ODD, tearing us apart.
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<blockquote data-quote="Malika" data-source="post: 498242" data-attributes="member: 11227"><p>Hello and welcome. Angel at school, devil at home? Yes, I recognise that - although my little one is only a comparative angel at school and can occasionally be angelic at home too <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" /> But I have been surprised at how well he holds it together at school in terms of complying to the not inconsiderable discipline. He will quite often explode when he gets home in the evening and I have decided that it is probably because it has cost him an <strong>enormous</strong> amount to fit in, not lose it, comply with directions, sit still and concentrate... and the explosion is an expression of that, a need to release so much pent-up energy and frustration. </p><p>As for the rest... my son has not been diagnosed anything yet, but certainly fits the ADHD/ODD model. I find in his case that his behaviour is quite related to how loved and appreciated he feels... warmth and positive encouragement work wonders with him, often - where discipline, anger and punishment fail completely. To what degree, if any, does this apply to your boy? Immediate rewards also work quite well - we have a piggy bank into which a small coin is dropped (saving up for a special toy he wants) every time he does something positive - I don't even really approve of this method in theory, but it does seem to motivate him and improve his behaviour! </p><p>I have found a mix of approach between The Explosive Child and also What Your Explosive Child is Trying to Tell You (Douglas Riley) quite helpful - taking the wheat and letting the chaff go. There is hope for better relationships and better behaviour with these kids, I do believe that.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Malika, post: 498242, member: 11227"] Hello and welcome. Angel at school, devil at home? Yes, I recognise that - although my little one is only a comparative angel at school and can occasionally be angelic at home too :) But I have been surprised at how well he holds it together at school in terms of complying to the not inconsiderable discipline. He will quite often explode when he gets home in the evening and I have decided that it is probably because it has cost him an [B]enormous[/B] amount to fit in, not lose it, comply with directions, sit still and concentrate... and the explosion is an expression of that, a need to release so much pent-up energy and frustration. As for the rest... my son has not been diagnosed anything yet, but certainly fits the ADHD/ODD model. I find in his case that his behaviour is quite related to how loved and appreciated he feels... warmth and positive encouragement work wonders with him, often - where discipline, anger and punishment fail completely. To what degree, if any, does this apply to your boy? Immediate rewards also work quite well - we have a piggy bank into which a small coin is dropped (saving up for a special toy he wants) every time he does something positive - I don't even really approve of this method in theory, but it does seem to motivate him and improve his behaviour! I have found a mix of approach between The Explosive Child and also What Your Explosive Child is Trying to Tell You (Douglas Riley) quite helpful - taking the wheat and letting the chaff go. There is hope for better relationships and better behaviour with these kids, I do believe that. [/QUOTE]
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New here- 7 y/o son with ADHD/ODD, tearing us apart.
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