Hey all. Boy, am I glad I found this site. I am totally new to the group, and currently struggling hard core to stay strong in my decision to kick my 21 yr old son out of the house, for the last time. I have 2 very difficult sons (twins). One who was living at home until yesterday and the other that I threw out of the house a few years ago, who now lives with my inlaws, so in effect, it didn't achieve the end result that I was hoping for, since it is me that gets the phone calls when he starts to kick off! I have a husband (who is father to all 4 of my kids), who unfortunately is having a hard time supporting me in this decision because he doesn't understand what good it's going to do, since he has nowhere to go. We have been living in total hell for the past 6 years, since the twins were 15. Drugs of all kinds, stealing, disrespecting, threatening, suicide attempts, cutting, you name it, I've dealt with it. Neither of them has been diagnosed with anything because neither of them are willing to submit to any kind of evaluation. We twin 2 locked up in a psychiatric facility when he was about to turn 16 because he tried to hang himself in our basement when he was high on morphine, and while he was in the facility they told us that there was no way to tell if he had any kind of true mental issue because everything that came out of his mouth was a lie!! Ultimately, they discharged him after 3 weeks because he was turning 16 and they could no longer keep him there without his permission, which he obviously wouldn't give. When he came home, we had in house therapy set up (multi systemic therapy). It was at least 2 nights a week, 2 hours each night. Of course, neither of the twins were willing to participate in it, so my husband and |I did it anyway, hoping that we could learn how to better deal with our situation. Well, after about 2 months of trying to help us, our therapist quit, because she didn't feel that she could help us!!!! Can you believe that?!! My kids were so bad, that a trained therapist gave up on them! About 3 years ago, our daughter needed emergency brain surgery (she has hydrocephalus). While we were in hospital with her, twin 2 stole my father inlaw\s car from our driveway and smashed it up. So, I kicked him out, came home from the hosptial and changed the locks on the house. When we arrived home, all the screens in our windows had been cut out, our bedroom door had been kicked in (we had put a lock on to try and keep then out) and our house totally ransacked, every bit of money that was in the house was gone, as well as jewelry. Later that night, twin 1 came to the door drunken and drugged up saying that he was our son, and how could we be ok with putting him out in the street and that he had no food to eat. All this, while my daughter is trying to rest and recover from invasive surgery that had complications. When we finally closed the door on him, he started kicking in our car, and my husband ran outside to push him off the property and that is when my son pulled a knife on us, chased us up the driveway and stabbed the knife into the door when we slammed it shut. I called the police and had him arrested and left him in the juvenile detention, with no intention of bailing him out, and after 2 weeks, my inlaws bailed him out. Figuring that he has been clean for 2 weeks, I gave him a chance to prove he could change, and a week later, he stole my bank card, and cleared out my account. leaving me with no money for groceries! When I called the bank, about recovering the money, they said that they wouldn't be able to because the PIN was guessed correctly on the 2nd try! So, out he went again, but of course, my inlaws took him in again! Even though both of the twins have stolen numerous things from them over the years, money, jewelry, alcohol, cars, etc. They have money, so it's not as damaging to them as it is to us, who have to work hard for everything that we have. By the way, neither of my sons have ever held a job for more than a couple of weeks, and both are high school drop outs. These are the kinds of things that have happened over the years, and my final straw was this weekend, when I realized that all of my younger kids Wii games were missing. Yep, he stole them and sold them for money for dope. As I am writing this, I am ignoring calls from him and arguing with my husband about whether this is the right thing to do, but I am tired of being a hostage in my own life! I am so sick of standing alone with all of this, I know that there is no easy answer, and I'm not even sure if what I am doing is the right thing to do, but what else can I do? I can't continue to expose my other 2 kids to all this chaos, they deserve to have a decent life. Any thoughts???