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General Parenting
New Here, But I'm Sure Not a New Situation
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<blockquote data-quote="ksm" data-source="post: 679306" data-attributes="member: 12511"><p>My response isn't exactly what you are asking for, but my two cents... How were you allowed to have biomom at your house when you were given custody of the kids? I assume the children are in state custody until you adopt. That means, unless she signed off on her parental rights, there will have to be a court case to terminate the rights. If they are in state custody, the state usually pays a monthly stipend to cover their care and also their medical insurance. Have you talked to the social workers involved about continuing these benefits until they are adults?</p><p></p><p>If she fights the adoption, will this be a long drawn out ordeal?</p><p></p><p>I ask because when we adopted our two granddaughters, we did not receive any of their benefits, because the court made it a private adoption. Once they became teens, the problems really started with behaviors and difficulty at school. My kids needed more help than we could really afford. </p><p></p><p>Please plan ahead in case you have difficulty later. Our girls biomom also drank, used heroin and cocaine. Their older brother was addicted at birth. He has actually done better than the ones she mostly drank alcohol during the pregnancy.</p><p></p><p>I admire all you are doing and not trying to put a damper on the future, but you will see on these boards that many kids seem to have more problems when puberty hits. My two girls have emotional problems because of the poor relationship with their mom. Now they tend to form poor social relationships. They get taken advantage of because they don't feel worthy to set their standards higher.</p><p></p><p>KSM</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="ksm, post: 679306, member: 12511"] My response isn't exactly what you are asking for, but my two cents... How were you allowed to have biomom at your house when you were given custody of the kids? I assume the children are in state custody until you adopt. That means, unless she signed off on her parental rights, there will have to be a court case to terminate the rights. If they are in state custody, the state usually pays a monthly stipend to cover their care and also their medical insurance. Have you talked to the social workers involved about continuing these benefits until they are adults? If she fights the adoption, will this be a long drawn out ordeal? I ask because when we adopted our two granddaughters, we did not receive any of their benefits, because the court made it a private adoption. Once they became teens, the problems really started with behaviors and difficulty at school. My kids needed more help than we could really afford. Please plan ahead in case you have difficulty later. Our girls biomom also drank, used heroin and cocaine. Their older brother was addicted at birth. He has actually done better than the ones she mostly drank alcohol during the pregnancy. I admire all you are doing and not trying to put a damper on the future, but you will see on these boards that many kids seem to have more problems when puberty hits. My two girls have emotional problems because of the poor relationship with their mom. Now they tend to form poor social relationships. They get taken advantage of because they don't feel worthy to set their standards higher. KSM [/QUOTE]
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