new here...need to feel not alone in this!

[Raine97]

K, so I have a 15 yr old son, with-o a proper diagnosis, been in and out of therapy and Special Education for 9 yrs now... I've tried every medication combo in the book, extensive therapy and can't get a true and proper diagnosis. I've been told he has ADHD,BIPOLAR DISORDER, SCHIZOID PERSONALITY DISORDER, AND ASPERGERS or all or combos of all of the above. He runs away constantly, thinks he can survive in the wild by himself, now we have shoplifting charges, and the only real thing i keep getting told is that he'll never make it in the real world. That even if i can get him to take his medications now, he'll stop when he's 18. So how do u just let go, its like being told ur child will die and there is nothing you can do about it.

 

[BusynMember]

Ok, welcome to the board. Sorry you had to be here. I have a few questions that will help us help you.

1/Has he ever had a neuropsychologist evaluation.

2/Are there are psychiatric problems or substance abuse issues on either side of his genetic family tree? Also, does he abuse drugs and alcohol?

3/This is important. How was his early development? Did he talk on time and clearly? Did he do his motor skills on time? Did he cuddle? Did he play with toys appropriately or did he dismantle them or have no interest in them? Did he have sensitivities to crowds, noise, bright lights, anything? Any obsessions? Any quirks?
In the now: Does he know how to socialize appropriately with his same age peers? Does he have an obsessive interests (such as computers, videogames over-the-top of normal, animals, anything?) Can he transition well from one activity to another or does change drive him crazy? Does he seem to "get it" as in life's rules and societal norms? How is his hygiene? Does he have much younger interests than others his age? How does he do in a room full of strangers? Any quirky behavior? Repetitive behavior?

Doesn't sound like he's really seen anyone who knows what his problems are. I would disregard the glum prognosis and forge ahead, trying to find out what is really wrong.

Others will come along. Hang in there. We've heard/seen it all.

 

[ML]

I'm glad you found us, but really sorry you had to. It's not hopeless. Many of us are living proof that life can go on even admist the chaos of living with difficult children. The friendship and support here has made a big difference in my life and I'm sure it will in yours. You are NOT alone. No way. Welcome, ML

 

[PatriotsGirl]

Welcome! You are definitely not alone. Mine was arrested for shoplifting, too. She had a prior charge for trying to cell drugs via cell phone. I just sent her to live with my mother to get her away from meth because no rehabs will take her unless she wants to be there. We all have really been there and have seen it all. Not fun. This website is one thing that keeps me sane!!!

 

[Fran]

What does your son do? What are his interests?
Does he go to school every day? Does he have friends? hobbies?.
Who lives in the home with you and difficult child? What is his excuse for running away?
What does the therapist have to say about your difficult child's lack of function?

 

[Bunny]

Welcome to the board. I also just wanted to add that you are not alone in this. See if you can have him evaluated by a neuropsychiatrist. They may be able to give you more answers that you have now. If you don't know where to find one, call your pediatrician and see if they can recommend someone. If your son is seeing a therapist now see if he or she will refer you to someone.

Pam