new here, not sure how everything works

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by panda, Apr 15, 2007.

  1. panda

    panda New Member

    hello everyone, I'm not sure how all of this works. but i really could use this site. and i am interested. I have a difficult child 1 that was recently diagnosed with a mood disorder, with the onset of bipolar, conduct defiance disorder and ADHD. he is on medications and doing better, but there are some days that i feel like i am going to fall apart. i have 3 boys, my oldest is 13 easy child, and is having a hard time having two little brothers that have issues as he likes to call it. difficult child 1 and difficult child 2 like to blame him for all of and anything they are upset about. difficult child 2 has severe ADHD, and is on medications, that the dr's will be changing soon. then i have a little 3 year old that is the light of the whole family, she is sometimes frightened by difficult child 1 behavior. sometimes it gets very overwhelming thinking of all the appointment. and money on copays that we are spending. we have enough money but it is very tight. difficult child 1 is going to be starting 7th grade soon, and i will be having to navigate the whole school again, trying to make sure they don't use his disorders against him. he is very gifted and can thrive very nicely in the right situation at school. it will be interesting to say the least. well i have to go play a game with difficult child 2 now. hopefully i did this forum thing right.
     
  2. LittleDudesMom

    LittleDudesMom Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Hi Panda,

    you did it right! You got the profile signature right off the bat which is an important piece.

    What your easy child is feeling is totally normal. So much time and energy go into parenting and being a sibling of a difficult child (not to mention two), and if he's older, there may also be times he is embarrassed.

    After a wonderulf school, Special Education department/teachers, understanding a totally helpful administration, my difficult child is moving on to middle school next year. I totally understand about getting them to new school and all the stress that entails. For us, difficult child had two years for the "school" to get to know him before he began having issues in second grade. That was a good thing for us because folks knew who he was before the behaviors could identify him.

    Moving to a new school will be tough - you so want them to know who your difficult children really are inside and not how they are defined by their disorders and struggles.

    I want to welcome you to the board and look forward to learning more about your family.

    Sharon
     
  3. Big Bad Kitty

    Big Bad Kitty lolcat

    Hi Panda

    I'm new here too. Let's get through this together.

    The warrior moms & dads here (in the short time since I found this site) have been super. They have a lot to offer. Sometimes just knowing that there are others out there who are going through the same things that you are is enough to give one the strength to get through a few more hours.

    Enjoying a few hours while the difficult child visits with the DEX~~~
     
  4. owutaqt

    owutaqt New Member

    Welcome! Although I am very new myself. I do find comfort in just reading the boards, that it is sooooooo very nice to know that it is OK to not know what to do with a kid, and it is OK to not feel that wondeful gushy love feeling cuz life is so hard with them at times. I used to feel soooooooo guilty for wishing they would just STOP it and I did not have the power to do it.

    I hope that things are going good for today.

    Julie
     
  5. WhymeMom?

    WhymeMom? No real answers to life..

    Just wanted to welcome you....I have been coming here for a long time and my son is now out of our home so I have fewer issues, but just wanted to welcome you. Weekends are a little slow so don't be discouraged if you don't get alot of responses today. More people will check in tomorrow....
     
  6. timer lady

    timer lady Queen of Hearts

    Popping in to offer you my welcome to our little corner of the world. To say the least, you have a very busy household.

    Again welcome & hope we can help you navigate the difficult child journey - we can certainly lend an ear or a shoulder to lean on.
     
  7. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    Welcome to the board :biggrin:

    Changing schools can be a real challenge. If your difficult children have an IEP in place it can be a huge help.

    I'm glad you found your way here.

    HUGs
     
  8. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Just adding in my welcome. Glad you found us, two difficult children is quite a handful. My easy child also struggles with her difficult child brother. I have another year before I have to worry about the transition to middle school for my difficult child. You will find much support here!
     
  9. panda

    panda New Member

    thank all of you for your responses, and yes today was a good day for me, but not so good for husband. he had to dicsipline difficult child 1 for not playing nicely on a team game on the x-box with his brothers and husband. he ended up being grounded from the computer and the x-box for a week. he owned up to it pretty good, but we will see what happens when husband is at work and i'm home and he wants to play on the computer. once again thank all of you, i don't feel so alone anymore
     
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